"she won't give me the hose maaaaaaaaaa!"
Wednesday, June 28, 2006

we're hoping against hop hope
Tuesday, June 27, 2006

that lucy wigglesworth is alive. gasp! (dramatic intake of breath)

yes, see. i told you. remember the goldfish i killed in less than 48 hours last year? now lucy has escaped her home sweet hutch and is running? happily through the woods here. realistically though, since she is not a wild bunny, either she got bullied into slave labor by the feral brown bunnies who live around here, or she has become a victim of one of these many red foxes that are living in the woods behind the monkey compund. yikes.

i don't know what happened- we went out to check and her door was open and she was gone. the door must have not been closed all the way and it was really windy.

we're over it already though. see evidence of love for the new friend found today in the garden...
i'm not so sure about this...

okay maybe.


free at last!

okay, maybe not so much. they were happy to release it into the woods to go find its' mommy.

parting words to the turtle:
Hannah: "bye mister turtle. go look for lucy."
Lily: "yeah, and if you find 'er, yell."

ps i am in some stooooooooooopid workshops for school this week every day. so sorry- i promise i will visit and catch up on all blogs next week!


there are two kinds of people in this world...
Sunday, June 25, 2006

...those who ALWAYS regardless of inconvenience return the cordless phone to the base so that when it rings next time they will know immediately without a shred of doubt where it is and can leap towards it with the kind of vigorous certainty that only comes with the assurance of knowing that the phone is exactly where it SHOULD be.

then, there are those, like myself, who prefer to tote it around or at least place it in the general vicinity of where i am in the house so i can answer sooner and/or not have to get up when montel is on, raising my convenience level but also risking that i will forget its' current location and have to flail around wildly when it rings in order to find it then have to call the person back if it wasn't a telemarketer and it's someone i want to talk to at that moment then have to make sure to remember to put it back at night so the battery doesn't get low.


doesn't it just tick you off?
Wednesday, June 21, 2006

when you check here and it's the same post you read last time?
"geez, would it hurt her so much to give us a freakin update?" you ask.

ok let's see

end of school...lots of chaos...crazy cleanup and finish grades and get out...children clinging & screaming "mommy are you done with work yet?...hot sun...lots of laundry to catch up on...tons of cleaning to do...trying to get ready 4 a yardsale of some type... beach...party! ...pool...boat...breezes...more laundry...and...

drumroll please...

a new pet bunnykins! her name is mrs. lucy wigglesworth. she's a little dwarf bunny- white w/ grey marks and she's lovely i say lovely. and so calm when the children drop her. JUST JOKING. peta don't picket my url por favor. but they do like to give 'er a good tousle.

pictures soon and lots of love and kisses!


ps this is not lucy. it is her stunt double.

don't look at the comments til you do it, k?
Monday, June 12, 2006


Thursday, June 08, 2006


(this is a repeat of last year's PSA right about this time. please read and take note. seriously.)

As warm weather arrives across our fair country, I feel it is my duty to deal with a necessary but unpleasant issue we are all faced with either having ourselves or being forced to view: toe cheese.

This avoidable condition is much more common in the male species, though there are some females who fall through the cracks as well. If you are the wife, mother, or daughter of a male who slaps on the sandals when warm weather hits without taking the time to examine his tootsies, please bring this to his attention.

I'm sure you will agree there is nothing worse than looking down at someone's feet and doing a double take bc there is a large wad of black sock lint or other substance of indeterminate origin wedged tightly in the corners of the big toenails. Gug and double gug.Do yourself or loved one a favor and examine your feet carefully before exposing them in public, or at home for that matter.

Ask yourself these questions:Are the corners of my toenails clean? If not, grap the nearest sharp object, be it a key, tweezers, paring knife or screwdriver, and dig that cheese out! Are my nails cut? No one's asking you to get a girly pedicure, but at least trim those dragon talons down to a nice manageable length.

If everyone takes these two easy steps to pedi-health and maintenance, all inhabitants of our lovely planet will have a more pleasant summer. Now, about those eagle eyebrows...

not a match. (dotcom)
Friday, June 02, 2006

okay, well, now that my membership is cancelled and my profile ain't there no more, i can tell you about this freaky website called match.com.

all my friends had been harrassing me about trying to "get out there" and mingle with other human mammals of the opposite sex. so i checked it out. they trick you by giving you a free trial and then you get sucked into their sick little world and you want to pay, bc hey, hope springs eternal, no? alright, let's see here.

Specimen A: we spoke for about a week on the phone then made arrangements to meet at a mexican restaurante. this male was confused by intellectual conversation and i had to explain several words i used to him to help him understand what i was saying. he never called anyway. strike 1.

Specimen B: nice house, lots of money, but weird. went on a 30 minute rant about reverse race discrimination in the NFL. he never called again. strike 2.

Specimen C: i liked him. we knew each other from a long time ago. after a few dates he told me he had been thinking about it and really didn't want to get in a relationship with me bc i have 3 year old twins and he's already raised 2 children and he doesn't want that responsibility. strike 3.

Specimen D: we im'ed and talked on the phone a while. he came to pick me up for dinner and he looked nothing like his picture. in his photo he had brown hair, glasses and was pretty youthful looking. when he got there, he was grey, no glasses, and very different looking, but hey that was ok. we had a nice dinner, he never called. strike 4.

so, what does this tell us? there's only one obvious conclusion...

although i am cute and witty on this blog, in real life it's more like this:


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Who's the Monkey Mama?

Location: Planet Twinstar, Monkeyville, United States

I'm a real live human person...the slightly wacky mom of 6 year old identical twin primate princesses and one 2year old monkeyboy. I'm divorced from a crazy baboon and remarried to a big snuggly gorilla. I thank God daily for my wonderful family and friends, without whom I would go berserk. My chirren are the cutest kids ever born (besides yours) and if you don't believe that you obviously need to see a shrink.

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