Q. Guess what I did today to make my life so much better?

A. Opened the back door of my mommy minivan and had a heavy metal beach chair fall on mah panky toe. Oh my po po panky toe. She is all bruised and swollen and when I walk the pain shoots up my whole daggon foot.
Normal Foot
My Foot
I'm not lyin it is purple and puffed up a like a sausage link. Which brings me to another issue: sausage- links or patties? But I digress.

I have diagnosed myself with a broken panky toe phalanges bone.

I'm sure wishing I had one of these but like for my panky toe.


I never knew until I did a search for toe pain that they had all these things for toe comfort. There are entire websites devoted solely to toe issues.

Here is another image I found to describe my panky toe problem.


Does anybody but me remember the scene from Harlem Nights where Della Reese gets her panky toe shot off? I bet it didn't hurt as much as this.

I have strapped my toe to its nearest 2 comrades with Nexcare Flexible Clear First Aid Tape and have received a little relief.

Did I mention it hurts like caaaaaaraaaaaaaazzzzy?

I just noticed this blog is getting very whiny. A big shoutout to the peeps who are still reading it. I love it when you call me Big Poppa Monkey Mama. (Stacy-say that with a British accent.)

That is all.