FYI: That new cereal Tiger Power with Tony the Tiger on the box tastes like crud-ola. I think it tastes like what that vegetable cereal would taste like in Daddy Daycare (you should watch that if you haven't seen it). They trick you by putting Tony on the box and making you believe it's gonna be GRRRRRREAT but my kids took one bite and said "Gaga" which means poopoo/trash/yucky stuff. I was all like "Mmmmmmmm it's sooooogood! Mommy likes it!" Then I popped a piece in to prove it and just about gagged. It's really cute and looks like it should be good. At first you think it will be grrrrrrrrrrrreat because it has a little layer of sugar on the outside, but it's like a Fireball; once the sugar dissolves you're screaming and spitting it out.

I want my money back!

Okay you'll never believe this. I didn't believe it myself at first . Click on the link below to see what Lily did. You have to click View Slideshow on the right side to get the whole effect and then close your eyes for like 10 seconds until the slideshow pops up, so you won't ruin the surprise!

Go on now, hurry up!

And I mean serious attitude. It developed like a Polaroid picture. One day, nice little baby, next day, BAM, screamer. My mom took this picture of Hannah yesterday when I was in the bathroom. This is what she does about 50% of the time when I dare to go in the bathroom or my bedroom, which is the other door you see in the photo, or in the kitchen and shut her out.

Would you look at this child? Accompanying this banging is a high pitched primal monkey scream which could be like just a general AYAYAYYAYAY Indian war whoop, an ear piercing MOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMY! (repeat,) or just recently added for your listening pleasure HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEY BAAAAAAAAAABY! I keep telling her my name is not baby, it's mommy. When the screaming is to no avail, she adds an additional attention getting measure; she gets down on the floor and sticks her hands and/or feet under the crack and sweeps them back forth. Lily will yell sometimes but nothing like this. What to do? I've tried everything I can possibly imagine. Nothing works.

Hannah has always been the dominant child, starting from the womb. When I was pregnant, she was always the kicking and pushing instigator. Twice I had to go to the hospital to get monitored because she pushed Lily around so that the home health nurse couldn't find her heartbeat. I mean, it's not like meanness, it's just like a "Miss Hotstuff" type thing, if you know what I mean.

Also note the skid mark on the wall. There used to be a pressurized swinging baby gate there until Hannah figured out that if she karate kicked it hard enough for long enough it would pop off so she could squeeze through like a little mouse through a hole. The whole wall was white until then. She is completely determined to get what she wants.

I don't even want to think about the teen years.

I'm sorry that my kids are so cute they make you want to jump through your computer screen and just squeeze em and smooch the heck out of em.

The Caramel Sauce that comes with McDonald's Apple Dippers, when piled onto a ponytail at the exact point of origin, and air dried for a minimum of 15 minutes, will bond the rubber band into monkey hair exactly like rubber cement.

After viewing the party photos (see below) you may ask yourself, "What the heck were those kids wearing?" If you really must know, they are wearing what all princesses absolutely must wear on their birthdays which are tutus. Of course being freezing outside, they couldn't sport just the tops and tutus, thus the pink leggings underneath. Additionally, the leopard print shirt went with the whole circus animal motif, but it was layered and trimmed with dainty pink ribbons for an extra feminine touch. White socks with pink ruffles and black mary janes finished the ensemble for a look we'll call "Jungle Chic." I really don't understand why everyone says the monkeys are already mini-divas. I can't help it if they get upset when their socks and outfits don't match. I have no idea where they got that from. Ahem.

Even though I had asked that no one bring gifts to the party, many rebellious guests went against the grain and gave the monkeys presents anyway. CaroleAnn and Jakie Baker brought them a Care Bears DVD a couple days beforehand. Anything with dancing bears is cool with them.
They got 2 beeyooootiful bouquets of pink flowers, some nice books including one I really love called My Mommy and Me, a Veggie Tales DVD,and some yummily Burt's Bees Baby Bees Lotion and Diaper Cream, which is our fave (from the Northern Aunties.) Their Aunty Tay, Uncle Caleb, and Cousin Ava E. gave them two new DVDs, Blue's Clue's Hug Day and 25 Years of Sesame Street Songs. We're not even gonna go there with everything their Uncle Bob and Aunt Sue brought them but the big thing was this. My ex's mom sent them alot of cute clothes and some moolah for diapers. Oh yes, and let's not forget the adorable singing bears I mentioned before from Auntie Barb in FL. They really are cute when you're not trying to sleep!!
I ordered them the Miffy Shape Sorter I had seen recommended in Parents magazine but that just got here yesterday. My Aunt Judy made them the warmest snuggliest blankets out of pastel Pooh Bear polar fleece material with kind of ragged floppy looking edges. Mommy may have to confiscate those and test them to make sure they're okay. Ha.
So people, if this is what happens when I say no presents, I don't want to think about what would occur if I said presents were allowed. Gracias for all the nice things.

My monks are blessed to have so many friends and extended family who love them. But how could you not love a couple of adorable smooching monkeys like these? I think their motto will be "All this and brains too." Too over the top? Perfect.

Here is the link to the birthday party pictures. I hope it works!

Click here dudes!

Yesterday I was still feeling sick but I went to work anyway out of obligation to my employers, bc they treat me right and they're the bomb, plus who else would give you, among other things, an Ipod mini and a year's subscription to Audible for Christmas??

After about 2.5 hours this girl couldn't take it anymore and I had to ask to leave which was cool bc there was noone on my schedule. When I got home my mom was there with the girls and I went back in my room and shut the door so I could lay down and try not to feel nauseous. Right about the time I just about fell asleep, I heard them banging on the door yelling "Maaaa" "mamamamammamamama---uuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhh- maaaaaaaa." Then I heard my mom come drag em down the hall saying "Leave your mommy alone she doesn't feel good."
So I tried to go back to sleep. When I had just nodded off again, I heard this scuttling and slight scurrying around the bottom of my door, which has a pretty good size gap. Then all of a sudden I hear this loud obnoxious voice singing Jesus Loves ME this I know, FOR the BI- BLE tells me sooooo etc., etc. I shot up in bed, ripped the sleep mask from my face and looked down. They were taking these teddy bears their Auntie Barbara T. had sent them for their birthday (thanks Auntie Barb!) shoving them halfway under the door and stomping on them to make them sing, so as to disturb their poor bedridden mother and make her COME OUT NOW NO MATTER WHAT BECAUSE I KNOW YOU'RE IN THERE.

So I put on my ipod and cranked it up so I couldn't hear them and passed back out. Sometimes a mommy just has to have her peace, right?

I'm still working on the slideshow with all the pictures. Here are a few to hold ya over.

Lily Joy 

Hannah Grace 

Tutu Cute! 

The circus party was a smashing success. I'm gonna post a photo album link as soon as I have time to use my dad's computer. Why can't you do it from your computer? you ask. Well in case I haven't mentioned I live in a muy rural area and believe it or not, urbanites, DSL is but a distant dream. Yep that's right everything I do is dialup and the world's slowest dialup at that. SO besides that, I don't have a printer hooked up to this computer to download pix off my camera card. So sad. When I want to post pictures it's gotta be done somewhere else. And even if I did have a way to download it would take fooooooreeeeeveeeeer. So hopefully tomorrow with the pictures.

Back to my original point which was, the party went great. I have to say the decorations were awesome for being so cheap. You'll see. We made this tent thing on the ceiling with those colored plastic tablecloths from the Dollar Tree. Originally I had wanted to make the whole inside ceiling look like you were inside a tent but that was too much trouble. I have a tendency to think big. Sometimes too big. Anyway it looked cool. I had alot of help so bigups to the party crew.

So after the fiesta, the girls came home and went to bed and then started barfing and having diarrhea chachacha. Then me. Lovely. We were up all night. Pounding headache- and then all day today too. Nice. Lots and lots of loads of laundry. If it wasn't for my mom I don't know what I would have done. She didn't get the funky bug but my dad did.

Random TV thoughts by Jack Handy: My mom was watching NASCAR today, which by the way I would never voluntarily view. It made me think of the movie Six Pack with Kenny Rogers. That movie ruled. The theme song was the bomb. If you've never seen you should watch it. I think I'll order it from NetFlix.

Growing Up Gotti - have you seen this show? It's like the most horrible thing that you can't stop watching. Disgusting and fascinating simultaneously.

Noggin is the girl's favorite channel and the theme songs to the shows get stuck in your head and make you bonko.

Okay that's all for now.

Coolness. I can now post audio clips for you to hear. This is a test one. Can't wait to get the girls talking on here!

P.S. Does everyone dislike the sound of their own voice????

First bday - chubby babies! Where have they gone? 

Hannah 

Lily  

Happy birthday to you
You live in a zoo
You look like 2 monkeys
But you smell like Gerber baby shampoo!!!

Hannah Grace

Lily Joy 

All of a sudden...the talking. Oy vey amigos. In case you didn't know the chimpies got tubes put in their ears in December because they had fluid all the time, and being in the profession I am, I wasn't going to wait it out like many pediatricians recommend bc I know the repurcussions of fluid when kids are at such a crucial age for speech development. I see it all the time. Of course many will argue against ear tubes but if you would like to discuss that further, have your people email my people.

Anyways, they have been busting out with about 2 new words a day for the past week or so. Soos n socks. Baby, but more like this- BAAAAby! dutty (dirty clothes) ga-ga(cacapoo pants) (with holding of nose and pointing to sister's backside) doggy puppy kee-ca (kitty cat) peez (please) gram-pa gee gee (GG - my grandmother) and so on and so on. As I have mentioned before they have definite ideas about what they will and won't do, so they may say a word then refuse to repeat it until a few days later.

BTW I'm listening to my radical pink mini ipod that my ultracool bosses gave me for Christmas along with an Audible subscription (yes,they rock) and highly recommend a new album from iTunes called iWorship - lots of great new Worship songs. Got it today. Love the David Crowder Band sp?. They're on it. It's a mix CD.

I wish you could see the most adorable dresses I got the girls for next Christmas at the Children's Place Outlet in AZ. Mom got cousin A the matching set. They're not on the website anymore bc they're last year's Christmas line but they are the CAAAYOOOTEST! They're dark red short sleeves with the satin on top and the big fluffo tulle skirt on the bottom and a big sash. They have the matching overjacket of the same color - it comes right below the armpits and is velvet with fur collar and cuffs. Cuteness factor - overloading the scale, people.

Oh my gosh my baby boo bears will be dos- count em - 2- years old tomorrow.
They were and still are little miracles and tangible evidence of the power of prayer.
Born February 18, 2003 at 8:40 & 8:42 pm after alot of scary stuff survived with mucho prayery stuff. I love them desperately.

Thanks, Big Guy, for the baby angels. Love, K8

Once again I have requested that no one buy anything for the girls' bday. I'm trying not to make thse monkeys into materialistic little consumers. However, since I know I will be ignored and peeps have asked what to buy, I give you the following. Just click on the link to see the thing.

Music they're into: Dan Zanes Laurie Berkner

DVD's: Anything Elmo or Sesame Street

Books: Anything animals, colors, counting, or potty related - but they must be board books because otherwise...shred city dude!

Here are the cutest chubby wittle Hershey's Kisses monkeys you ever did see. This was taken at 10 months. Look at those cheeks! Cupid ain't got nothing on these two!

I'm back from AZ and here are a few crazy pictures. It was cool out there, being from the East Coast and all, I had never been to that part of our fine country. Cactuses, sand and lots of people for me to speak español to. It rocked. But I missed my monkeys.


Looking down over the roof of the resort at night. That's right, resort baby, no cheesy Motel 6 for monkey mama. Thank goodness for companies that have their conferences in places like this!

One of the pools. Of course those are lit up cactuses in the background by the pool silly!

Why are these all funky lookin night pix? Cuz it was raining every day. Ain't that my luck? This is looking over a bridge at the resort down at one of the pools.

Me at night that's why it's all wacky lookin with all the crazy lasery things in front of my head. No, I don't know why my left eyebrow is arched up like Cruella Deville. I promise my eyes arent't really asymmetrical. Perhaps I was trying to look sultry, but I doubt that.

Here's the girls' Christmas pics in case you haven't seen them. 

Pose 2 

Pose 3 

I know that it will be hard for you to live without new pix of the monks for this long, but I'm going to AZ for my job until Sunday. In the mean time, focus on ideas for their bday party and leave your comments for me to let me know how smart you are.

The theme is...drumroll please.............the circus!!! Super duper exciting. So far we have striped tablecloths sp? plates and napkins that are like bright circus colors. I want the hall to look like you're in a circus tent so I need to figure out a way to do that. There will be a clown making those balloon animals- no I'm not paying for it my friend's daughter does it. And of course the cake will be circus themed (with clowns.) Now, what else would be cool yet cheap and easy?

I made the invites myself on the computer. They have a picture of a circus tent and ringmaster on the front and the front says

I hear that a circus is coming to town
With camels and popcorn and elephants and clowns!
But what's the occasion for this travelling zoo...?

(Open card)

Those silly twin monkeys are gonna be 2!
Then all the details, etc. And of course there's a graphic inside of two circus monkeys.


BTW when I get back I'm gonna do a photo album from their birth til now so you can revel in the chubby baby-ness. Til then...pray for my mom who going with me and is scared to death of flying. Then pray for my nerves to put up with her! Just joking. Or not.

If you visited yesterday, bl*gger had my profile mixed up w another blog and some other posts on my blog that weren't mine. So it will take me a few days to redo my profile. Thanks-k8!

Of course they both wouldn't look up at the same time for the picture. H. is kissing L. on the shoulder. She is such a kissy monster - she is always trying to pin L. down to smooch and hug her.

H. showing off for the camera 

Trying on Valentine's head boppers at Party City 

I have always liked the pants and one piece suits with the snap crotch because they're easier for changing diapers. However, now the girls have discovered the wonderful world of snaps. If they have something on that snaps in the crotch, guaranteed they will have it unsnapped in 30 seconds or less. So they got their first pair of big girl jeans with the zipper and snap in front. I can't believe how grown up they are! Plus, they think they rule with these jeans on; when we got them Mom tried put them on them to see if they fit okay and they were strutting around pointing to them like they knew they were cool and they didn't want to take them off. They wore them for the first time yesterday.

Dear Ma, I promise I will not ever try to feed my Little Mommy baby doll bananas again because I know now that she will not eat them and the banana mush will jam down in her little mouth and then rub all over the new sofa slipcover and I will scream because her mouth is full of gunky brown mush and it will get all over my hands and will not totally come off when I try to clean them on my pants. Love and Kisses, L.

Okay last one for now, I promise. H is saying, "You talkin' ta me?" 

This one's muy adorable also. It's the baby starlet cousin A. in her Christmas appearance, (before her cousins ganged up on her and took her pappie then bonked her on the head with the Fisher Price Karoake Machine microphone.) 

It may be just me, but they're the cutest and smartest kids ever born. Gracias. 

It's hard to put into words what a complete and total joyous trip these kids are. (Granted, there are times when they decide to go on a non stop tag team whining marathon and I think to myself " I could quite possibly go completely insane in the legal definition of the term if they scream 'MAAAAAAAA' or 'EEE EEEE EEEE EEEE' one more time.") More on the unique style of screaming they have developed when they don't get what they want at a later date.

Back to the good part which is 99.9%. The things they do, the gestures and sign language they have developed, the way they like to invent dances and make silly faces to see if you will laugh at them is so awesomely adorable- sometimes I look at them and wonder "I grew these???" Have I mentioned so far for people who do not know them personally that until just recently they have refused to talk in English and they're two on the 18th of February? Yes, they communicate with each other in their own twin language they have developed along with hand gestures they use. According to the experts this is completely normal and is called twin talk. It's more common in identical twins. It's also not that they can't talk it's that they won't. Not that they could say complete sentences but when they feel like it they will say words like "juice" "baby" "dog" "ki-ca" (kitty cat) or "diaper." Then when you try to get them to say it again they just laugh at you. The personalities these two have makes everybody say "If they're like this now, wait until they actually do start talking." (My mom says it's payback. Very funny.)

For example when they want a pacifier they make a sound and put their finger up to their mouth like a pacifier. When you try to get them to say pa-pa, which is short for pacifier, they won't unless they want to. The other day L. wanted one. She got my attention and started making the sign. I said "Say pacifier or pa-pa if you want one" and she shook her head no and continued with the signing. I said "No pa-pa unless you say it please" and on and on like that back and forth for the whole time I was changing her and H. Then she saw the actual pappie itself and the edge of the dresser and started whining and fake crying, which is another thing they have invented to get their way unless you know better. "No pappie until you say the word- just say it and you can have it."Again with the no-no- shaking head and then a little stomping thrown in for good measure.

Just then she heard mom come in the back door and ran out into the living room while I was finishing up with H's diaper. I heard her make the pappie noise and mom said "You want a pacifier L?" and gave her one before I could tell her I had been trying to get her to say it for about five minutes. L. then trotted back into the bedroom and stood in front of me so I could see her with the pappie in her mouth. She then removed it and yelled "Pappie!" at me before turning to run away. Wiseguy.

Wiggling toes and gripping them like a monkey on the edge of your highchair tray while you're eating makes food taste better...it's a proven fact. 

L

H

Ever since their baby cousin A. came home for Thanksgiving, and then again at Christmas to stay for a while, the girls have been into anything having to do with babies. I had gotten them totally off their pappies (pacifiers) except at bedtime. Forget that after Thanksgiving. Since the baby had one, they had to have one too, or they would just unplug hers and she would start screaming. Now they're back into having them off and on during the day, or at least available at their disposal - L more so than H. They like to have a few available, and they store them in the sink of their kitchen set. Whenever a baby comes on TV, they are automatically glued to the set. (No, sister dear, they haven't gotten ADD from watching Elmo.) The main things to remember about babies are:

1. they must be stripped of all clothing, then wrapped in a blanky
2. the blanky cannot be exposing any part of the baby's body except the head
3. the babies must all be put to bed together and tucked in with bottles, bears, and blankies galore, as many layers as you can find.

Another new baby themed activity is for them to actually be the baby themselves.They climb into your lap with a blanket, towel etc., and you have to make sure they have a pappie and a stuffed animal to snuggle. Then you have to rock them and say "Awww what a cute little baby." Then they make litle baby grunting noises and nuzzle. But if a body part accidentally becomes exposed, say a foot for example, it's time to scream bloody murder til it's covered again. The cutest is when you say "Come kiss the baby" and the other one comes over and smooches her sis.

Tonite at GGs house they were making Wrinkles the pug be the baby. They have those fake baby bottles that look like they have liquid in them, so they threw the blanket over Wrinkles and she, who normally stays out of hyper twin interaction distance, went limp in defense, which was even worse for her. They made her drink the bottle and forced a teddy bear on her for good measure. Everyone including GG got sick enjoyment from the whole incident, then Wrinkles jumped up and ran away to doggy therapy. Fun was had by all.

No, I didn't climb into the toilet last night; I'm way too angelic for that. 

Chubby Cherubinas