Tuesday, August 30, 2005

I had the silly misconception that I would actually have time to do something exciting today, like make lesson plans, or cut out and laminate colored letters, but alas, no. More meetings. The meeting I thought I would miss yesterday afternoon when I went to get my computer was postponed until this morning. It took them 2.5 hours to review the staff handbook.

Important things I gleaned from the meeting:
1. Be on time.
2. Don't leave early.

Then at the end of that meeting, they told us that there are like these other meetings that everybody has to go to, some only once, some anually. They all mostly have initials and they're meant to expand your mind and your students' thought process. I found out that at 2pm I had to go to a CARIT meeting at the high school. That stands for Child Abuse Recognition and something else I don't remember. It wasn't so bad. I was just a little snoozy from lunch still until they said "There will be a quiz at the end and if you don't pass it you must retake this here class again." Then I snapped to attention and at the end I was ticked cuz it was a 10 question T/F quiz that I could have answered without the class. I do see the point of it, really, but I'm glad it's only once.

Important thing I learned from that meeting:
1. Don't hit the students.

Tomorrow, there will be another meeting, a county wide pep rally to kick off the school year with some inspirational speaker to get everybody pumped up for action. Um, yeah. I would love to have time to actually do something constructive. But who am I to say what's constructive when they're paying me, right? I will attempt to sneak a picture with my camera phone for some undercover excitement. Then we will break into subgroups in the pm for more...guess what...meetings.

Ahoy maties- I'm off to dinner with my brother who's still home. You have to feed him alot because he eats like a lumberjack who just got off the Atkins Diet.


Monday, August 29, 2005

I had forgotten how exciting staff meetings are. But really, I didn't yawn once. They made us stand up and say our name and the subject we're teaching. Guess who had to go first???

I do remember that there were lots of thingies with initials like SOL, AYO, TSW, and FYI none of which apply to me because the state only tests for those things in the "core" subjects- math, english and reading and sometimes history depending on the grade.

We each got manila envelopes with fresh supplies in them: 1 post-it pad, 2 red pens, 2 black pens, staples, (no stapler,) 1 box of paper clips, and some other little stuff I can't remember. Oh yes, I forgot there were free donuts in the cafeteria but I didn't eat any.

The teacher who had my job before left exactly ZILCH to go from so basically I have to do everything from scratch and figure it out on my own. Every teacher gets a laptop issued to them for the school year and they told me mine was at the other school. (I can't remember if I told you but I work at 2 schools. One is 10 minutes from my house and the other is 20 minutes past that in the same direction. In the morning first thing I go to the furtherest school for 3- 45 minute periods and teach 2 classes with a space in the middle. None of the classes are in the same room, by the way.) So anyways, I also had to hunt down my teacher's edition of the book, workbooks, and all other stuff cuz nobody knows anything and they want to help you but really they have no idea, but they're nice anyway. I ended up finding everything I needed by the end of the day. I went to the other school and got my computer. The one closest to me that I come to in the afternoon is my "home" school so I do have a desk there but I have to share the room with an ESL teacher. It's really not bad overall and I think it will be fun actually. For Spanish I it's pretty cool -they give you 2 weeks per chapter which is alot slower than I used to teach it. Hopefully I'll be able to get some fun activities in- which I love- instead of all just memorizing and stuff.

Oh yes, and there's a laminating machine and lots of colored bulletin board paper which will be fun. Bwah ha ha!


I KNEW they wanted to be in pageants.
Sunday, August 28, 2005

My friends say my kids are the world's most photographed children. I denied it until lately, I noticed every time they see someone with a camera they say "cheese" with a big grin. Tonight I was walking down the hall putting my camera away and Lily said "Mommy, CHEESE, look!" and posed in the hall.
bigcheese Lily
Then Hannah started saying it too and then they were saying "More More!" and moving around in different places smiling all different faces saying "Cheese! Cheese!".
smiles!Hannah's new slitty eye smile look
Then when I said, ok enough, no more pictures, they started pouting. I think they really are Little Miss America material, guys. With these faces and the dresses we are an unbeatable package. Now, for the talent portion...let me think. (rubs palms together) Song? Dance? Combo? It should definitely involve jazz hands.

More shot's of mama's little trophy getters...
picnic1Church picnic today

Okay one more. Look at these fat piggy toes. They call these their "flopflops."

Exciting- just a liiiiiiiiiittle nervous: I have my first day at my new job tomorrow so pray for me please. I will be sure to let you know how it goes.


This could be a Photo Caption Contest.
Saturday, August 27, 2005

Which is more disturbing- this picture itself or the fact that I burst into a high pitched snarky sick, maniac-type laughter when I look at it, every time I look at it?

Added by k8: Don't have a cow man! It's obviously a staged picture. I don't think little kids getting terrorized by a rodent they idolize is funny. It's just the contrast of what you would normally see Mickey doing versus this scenario that I find amusing.

I was afraid to show you these.
Friday, August 26, 2005

If you live in or near the South, you know about "Liddl Dolly Dresses." If not, maybe you saw them on a pageant documentary on A&E. They are handmade ruffly dresses that look like wedding cakes and have big petticoats underneath. Okay so it's cheese to the maximum degree. I would never intentionally seek them out to put on my children.

Buuuuut... when I was perusing twin auctions on ebay and saw 2, in the monkeys' size, brand new with tags, for 6 dollars each with matching socks, I bid on them. I really didn't think that I would win them bc I looked at the website and they're expensive new. This is the exact dress I got two of. So I paid 12 plus 6 shipping for both with the little ruffly socks. Now the only question is, what do I do with them? They're hanging in my kitchen in all their Dolly Glory in the original plastic wrapper, nonetheless. You can't exactly put them on your kids to go to McDonald's. Even for church they're fancy. I was thinking about maybe their Christmas picture in them? They would still fit cuz they're 2T.

Shut up, they will not be scarred for life if they wear these. I think I should force them to wear stuff like this while I still can.

ps should I get the matching doll dresses?

Thursday, August 25, 2005

Today my mom and I worked alot in the house. She is still trying to wade through the mounds of old papers and stuff and shred them. There is so much. I've been doing misc. stuff here and there trying to get it going but the task is overwhelming. My brother power washed the back and front for me. He acts like he's doing me a favor but really he's pretending that he's shooting lots of bad guys. He was listening to an MP3 while he was doing it. I think the song was Eye of the Tiger.

Here are some random photos of today. If you click on each big picture as it's showing you can read what I wrote to explain it.

Also, this is what the girls were doing when I looked up tonight. They were actually having imaginary conversations while writing.
august 25 2005 003
This is what happens when the babysitter stays on the phone too much. Monkey see, monkey do. Ahem. ::cough mom:: I wonder from whence this behavior came.

Okay I'm going to crash now. Can any of you babysit tomorrow? Come about 10am. Thanks.


ps i put this banner up top. i have been reading about rebekah through steve's site. having kids and seeing this is so heartwrenching. please keep this little girl and her family in your prayers.

If PETA could read my mind...

..I'd be on their hitlist fer sure. Why? Because there is a cat named Percy living in my house- my soon to be new house. Granted, he was there a long time before me, and yes, 12 years ago I did rescue him from the side of the road but for crying out loud, I don't want to live with him.

You're just mean. Mean mean mean, you say. No. This cat is a squawker. Is that a word? He screams constantly when he wants food or attention which is always. He sheds massive amounts of hair. (Of course you know I have a thing against animal hair. It grosses me out.) His breath stinks like rotten old cat cavities. He climbs on your lap as soon as you sit down and starts digging in with his long sharp claws. And he does that kneading bread thing which is not only sick for a senior citizen cat but very painful.

And to top it all off, he POOPS and PEES and CLAWS randomly wherever and whenever he wants. I have implored, begged and otherwise whined to my mom to please let me do something with him, but no, she says, he's too old. He'll die if you move him somewhere else.

Did I mention I'm getting a new sofa? I just know the second he sees it he's gonna pee on it. Then claw it.

PercyHe hears a noise and turns momentarily to glare at the disturbance.
Percy2 1/4 of a second later, he gives me the cat equivalent of "talk to the hand."

I have tried being nice and petting him but then I get hair all over me. And in my mouth, Blech, there's just so much hair. And did I mention he poops and pees in the house when there's a perfectly clean litter box available? We got him a scratching thingy and catnip. He's not going for it.

I feel so guilty. I have negative thoughts about him. I won't tell you what they are or you will hate me 4evah.


ps... fyi if my comments link won't open in your browser, right click it and choose open in new window.

Wednesday, August 24, 2005

Living without the internet for all this time has made me realize that what Kurt says is true. Other people DO exist, with all their annoying wants and needs.

I have also realized that when you go without blogging something interesting for a long time, alot of people stop checking your blog as regularly and you feel rejected.

You have to give "them" what "they" want. It's a tricky mixture of kid pictures, amusing anecdotes, queries of advice on personal subjects, and just straight up old fashioned tomfoolery.

I'm sorry my blog has been so "blah" lately. Hang in there people. I'm starting a new job, moving into a new house that has a stinky old cat in it, and there's lots more madcap mischief on the back burners, guys. I promise I will strive harder to not have my network card blow up. Thank you.

Roosters- they're like chicken, but tougher.
Tuesday, August 23, 2005

Number one, poultry people, it's not just ANY old rooster theme, it's RETRO roosters. Not just like regular roosters. The kitchen is vintage looking and the valances I ALREADY BOUGHT have like a cute little vintage rooster on them. So there.

Monkey fix for those loyal monkey maniacs having primate withdrawal symptoms...
I left my camera at my mom and dad's so I used the camera phone. A little blurry yet still adorable! My aunt sent them these 2 fleece blankets she handmade with a monkey ballerina fabric. I dunno if you can really see it good in the pic.

More tomorrow.

15 Minutes of Internet Time...
Monday, August 22, 2005

Computer guys were supposed to have called between 9 and 12 to set time to come replace the part. 11 am... no call. Raise your hand if you're shocked.

Throat- good
Ear- mucho pain, still. Going to MD today.

Vacation summary- nothing to get excited over. Didn't go far. Visited with sister, swam, ate lots of crap, and shopped for stuff I needed for the new house. Found just about everything.

Are roosters a cheesy kitchen theme? Do tell.

My kids were diagnosed with eczema. Brought on by environmental allergies... Ever heard of that?

Starting new job next Monday. Trying to get moved by then. Painters finished, sofa delivery Thursday. Oh yeah, I got a microfiber couch with double recliners. It's like a browny-taupey-sagey color. Confused??

It's like this but not this exact color and it has buttons you push to recline instead of the big handle. Face it, America, microfiber is the new suede. And no animals had to die.

But if I could afford it animals would die bc I really wanted leather but too expensivo. :)

I hope I remember to take before and after pictures. I probably will forget.

Okay, gotta go. I miss your blogs, people. Sniff.


Friday, August 19, 2005

No DSL. Faulty network card in NEW COMPUTER. No one coming to fix it until next week.

No I.M. ing. No blogging. No reading blogs. No nuttin.

::weeping like a whiny baby::

Thursday, August 18, 2005

When I got back and tried to use my computer, I cried out in a frustration bc the DSL is not working. I called customer service and held for 45+ minutes, and when I finally got transferred...THEY DISCONNECTED ME. After banging my head against the wall a few (dozen) times, I decided it would be best to wait and try again later. I'm at my parents' house right now. If my nerves can handle it I'll try to call again tonight to fix it.

On another whiny tip, starting Monday I got a yikes!-ly painful infection in my right ear, tonsillitis, and a sinus infection all at once, then my back went out. I'm on antibiotics now. Take me out in the woods and shoot me, please.

Besides that, everything's fine.

So, how are you?

Sunday, August 14, 2005

I am retreating for a few days to an undisclosed location without the young mammals. There will be sun and water, (chlorinated or salt,) food, and shopping.

Be back Wednesday.

Need something to do this weekend???
Saturday, August 13, 2005

This website is the coolest. Kids of all ages will dig it.

Thursday, August 11, 2005

Reasons to Not Like Me
I'm anal retentive with grammar and spelling.
I use the term anal retentive.
My second toe is longer than my big toe.
I like to watch The Christopher Lowell Show.
I hum alot.
I am a major smart aleck.
I ruined my own vacation not to mention other peoples'.
I like the DeBarge song Rhythm of the Night.
I leave my used Splenda packs on the counter by the coffee pot.

Reason to Like Me:
I made these myself.

Fudge on a stick.

I'm not going to Mexico. I lost my everloving birth certificate I can't get one from this state overnight, and I have no passport. I had to cancel the trip. Thank God for travel insurance. Dear Stacy, If you're reading this before I talk to you, you're probably reeeeeeeaaaaaaaaalllllllllllly mad. Remember- I love you.

Now, where should we go in the US? I was thinking Florida, Arizona, California???? I'm up for any last minute suggestions.

My grandma fell and broke her hip today and she's having surgery tomorrow afternoon. Please pray for her.

My life needs less drama, I am thinking.


ps i did find $20 when i was ripping my house apart looking for the birth certificate so
that's positive.

The anticlimactic moment...
Tuesday, August 09, 2005

Alright kids, here it is. And don't be ticked at k8 when you read it and say, "That's it???" You see, while it may not seem like a big thing to you, it is a major thing for me.

I have been working at the same job for almost 4 years. While I previously envisioned myself retiring from this same job, recent circumstances (the Friday before last) have begun to make me question my future at this job. I started praying about what I should do (or not do.)

In case you have been reading this site but have not read my 100 things- how DARE you- I used to teach Spanish but stopped, not bc I didn't like teaching but bc I didn't like the politics of the school where I was involuntarily transferred.

The weekend before last after prayerful consideration, I had my mom's friend (who has contacts) make some inquiries for me to see if there was a Spanish job open in the Monkeyville school system. I figured there wouldn't be, and that would be the end of it. Spanish jobs are not easy to get bc they're not like other subjects where there are alot of teachers needed, like English or Math. Mostly there's one, maybe 2 teachers at each school who stay there til they croak or retire, whichever comes first.

She called that Monday night and said a job had just opened up and I should call the school board office. I called Tues morning, left my info; 2 hours later they called back and wanted me to come at 1pm for an interview, so I did. After that, the same day they sent me to interview w both principals (it's a travelling job,) and on the way home the Asst. Super. called my cell and offered me the job.
Whoa nelly.
I feel like this is meant to be bc everything happened like that. Of course I did not take the decision lightly bc the job I have, I started from scratch, built up my department from nothing, went to school, took the tests to get licensure- basically killed myself for. I thought I would be there forever. But God was like, um... negative.

I couldn't tell you through all the interviews, phone calls, stress, etc. bc I don't think it's professional until I told my bosses, which I did yesterday. I don't know exactly who reads this from where so I didn't want to take the chance. I will be telling you more as the days go by about what exactly I'll be doing. It's awesomely exciting for me!

I can make more money, cuz the job I got is the bomb, get off earlier, and have holidays and summers off with my kids. That is really important for me bc they'll be in school sooner than I want to think and I'll be there for them. It's the next best thing to what I would really like to do, which is be home all day and homeschool them. Obviously that's not gonna happen, so God gave me this opportunity which has been really quick and stressful because normally you make moves like this after considering it for a while.

So boys and girls of the globe, that is the big thing about which you have gotten yourselves worked up. I hope you don't think it's a big letdown. :)

And of course we have the Mexico trip- we're leaving Saturday, moving to a new house, yada yada. Not enough happening ya know.

Monday, August 08, 2005

Saturday, August 06, 2005

Great. Now that everyone is all worked up over what I have to say, unless I have unearthed a dinosaur skeleton in my backyard or won a 5.5 million lottery, no one will thnk it's that big of a deal.

I was going to be able to tell you yesterday, but now I can't tell you until Monday. I'm not trying to make you nuts but you will understand why when I explain it.

Have you heard???? This is outrageous.
Thursday, August 04, 2005

This is upsetting, thought I should pass it along. Check your drivers license... Now you can see anyone's Driver's License on the Internet, including your own!

Go to the website and check it out. Just enter your name, City and state to see if yours is on file. After your license comes on the screen, click the box marked "Please Remove".
This will remove it from public viewing, but not from law enforcement. http://www.license.shorturl.com/

And in unrelated news...
Wild Monkeys

Wednesday, August 03, 2005

I really really reeeeaaaaaaaaaalllllllly want to tell you why I feel like this (see picture above) but I don't know 100% who does and doesn't read this blog and I have wait just a couple days- maybe less- until I can blog about it. It's not a trick to make you read my blog, I promise. (Although now that I think about it that would be a good idea. Hmmm. No, if I want to do that I'll just go tick somebody off on a forum somewhere so they psychotically stalk me then you can watch. HA!) It is something super duperty good for k8.

I can tell you what it's not though, can't I?
I'm not pregnant (that can be completely excluded)
I'm not in love with some boy.
I'm not moving. No wait I am moving but just across the street.
I'm not getting a new car, though I would like a nice used SUV.
I didn't get a child support payment from my ex husband.
I didn't get a raise.

Just a little food for thought for ya.


The suspense is killin' me.
Tuesday, August 02, 2005

Okay today something good or bad could have happened. Instead something superkalafragalisticexpyalodocious occurred. Wanna know why?

Drag your mouse from the x to the o

XEven when you can't see Him, God is there.O

Thanks for the prayers and keep on keepin on with 'em cuz the worst part is over but there's still some little loose ends to tie. Then I can spill the beans.



ps tonite while i was lying on the sofa, a monkey tried to give me CPR by pounding on my chest and i don't recommend that recusitation method at all.

Pray without ceasing!

Something is happening I can't discuss right now. Please pray for my children and I. (It's nothing medical so don't freak on that tip.)


Lilypie 1st Birthday Ticker
Who's the Monkey Mama?

Location: Planet Twinstar, Monkeyville, United States

I'm a real live human person...the slightly wacky mom of 6 year old identical twin primate princesses and one 2year old monkeyboy. I'm divorced from a crazy baboon and remarried to a big snuggly gorilla. I thank God daily for my wonderful family and friends, without whom I would go berserk. My chirren are the cutest kids ever born (besides yours) and if you don't believe that you obviously need to see a shrink.

How is she feeling?

The Monkey Mama's imood is
My Unkymood Punkymood (Unkymoods)

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Contact me, the monkey mama. two_wild_monkeysatya hoo.com

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