Aliens ate my internet
Thursday, March 31, 2005

I am in a complete state of brain shocked-ness; our dsl was out at work all day today. I have not been on the internet for almost 12 hours. I really thought I would need a Valium soon. Now I must go out to dinner w my sister so I can't do a real post til later. I was truly in a state of emotional email, no blogs, no news, no nada! I felt as though I was cut off from the world. We were discussing this at work in our sheer downtime boredom so, what is your answer??

Q. What would you do if you woke up one morning and the whole internet was GONE? Not your computer, but like aliens sucked out the whole world wide web? Calm down, it's not going to really happen, but what would you do?

Everyone answer, even you anonymous readers who have never commented. :)

Note: People have been leaving comments and they keep disappearing and reappearing. So just keep trying. I wish Blogger would seriously get their stuff together!!! Don't give up on me folks!

Run, monkeys, run!
Wednesday, March 30, 2005

My goodness- could it be that spring has actually sprung here in wild monkey country?? I woke up this morning to sunshine and birdies singing for the first time in I can't even remember when. It was like I was in the Snow White movie except there's only two dwarves - Whiny and Hungry. Now if it could not rain long enough to dry up all the mudholes in my driveway and the monkey play pen we'd have it goin on. Because dry monkey play yard means free range wild monkeys which means tired go to bed earlier wild monkeys. Mommy likey. Oh yes.

On a sadder note it absolutely breaks my heart on days like today when I get to go home for lunch and my little booboo bears are there and they cry and scream when I have to go. Today when I left Hannah was at the gate yelling "mama mama no" and pointing to the sofa telling me to sit down. Moms who don't have to go out of the home to their job are lucky duckies. And don't yell at me because I know that being a SAHM or WAHM is just as much actual work; it's the whole leaving thing I can't stand. I want to be there every morning when they wake up. I feel like I'm missing so much and there's nothing I can do differently. They need health insurance and food and heat and diapers. Good thing is my job is really close so I don't have a long commute like some folks do. Yay for that.

My sister and the baby starlet Ava E. are coming to stay from Thursday til Sat. I'm muy excited even though I'm sure we'll yell at each other at least half a dozen times while she's here. We're gonna work on some stuff for Ava's first bday party. I'm a big do-too-much-over-the-top-party-planning type of chick! I love making favors and stuff like that. And I'm getting my hair cut Friday and my hairy hairy eyebrows waxed. If you don't believe they're hairy just look at a close up of one of these. Ay carumba!

PS I'm partial to monkeys but this baby bunny is super cute too.avabunny

A letter to acne

Dear The Zits on My Face,
I would like to bring to your attention that I am almost 33 years old. Perhaps you thought I was 13 instead. But I am an adult now and I'm finished with you, so please go manifest yourself somewheres else.
Gracias, k8

Trucker Hats Rule
Tuesday, March 29, 2005


They each already have their own style going on. Hannah only likes her hat on backwards, and Lily the opposite.
PS In the first picture Lily is looking up at American Idol on TV. Bad bad monkey mama. She could be scarred for life by some of those performances.

Be afraid, be very afraid. (of this post)

Blogger has been totally wacked all morning long. You know, it's free and all but come on now- it's completely ridiculous how often you try to post, edit, or leave folks comments and you can't because all you get is a system error. Wouldn't you think that enough people would have complained by now that they would have fixed it? Or if they're doing maintenance or something why not do it in the middle of the night. Okay so that would be different for people around the world, but let's not get technical.

My bedroom is a wrecked out junkpile. Since it's the only room the monkeys never go in, I have been putting anything I find or have to move that I don't want them to have.

  • Electric heater that used to be in their room until they started climbing out of their cribs, check.
  • Tub of ebay clothes, check.
  • Basket of magazines and rippable books, check.
  • Basket and hamper of dirty clothes, check.
  • Basket of clean clothes, pile of clean clothes, both now wrinkled beyond recognition because I didn't have time to fold them, check.
  • Huge stuffed baboon lent to me for bday party decor then given to the girls to keep but too big for living room, check.
  • Rechargable cordless Barbie Bissell vacuum, check.
  • Tons of other assorted crud that has migrated to the back of the house and been thrown in my room, check.

Whenever (like this morning) I am home and come in here to try to clean/sort/organize it, my children do everything they can think of to deter me from my goal. Just when I think there is nothing else accessible for them to put in their mouths, take apart, or otherwise find a potentially hazardous use for, they find something. I was in here earlier and I heard them whining/arguing over something that was making the weirdest sound and I said "What is that?" Hannah came and held up close enough for me to see, but not touch, this round soundmaking thing that used to be in the bottom corner of their "It's Time to Potty" book. Evidently, she had dissected it out of the book and was now pushing it repeatedly to the dismay of her sister who wanted it so she could make the potty flush too. Not only does did it make the world's longest flushing toilet sound but it also has this little girl giggling gleefully and for an unnaturally eerie amount of time after the flush sound, so joyous and happy, I suppose, that she has used the potty.

Since it was too big too choke on and the battery was sealed inside, and I didn't feel like chasing her for it, she kept the flush flush thing going for quite a while until she had drooled on it so much that the sound 1.wouldn't stop 2.turned into a sound like a slow motion tape recorder 3. turned into a sound like the squealing of brakes. I finally took it and smothered it under some clothes on top of the washer til the battery runs out. It's still there now, doing its thing.

Am I whining too much today?? I don't care because that's the mood I'm in. It's overcast and yucky and I have to get ready for work and before I got to work I have to go pay a 200.00 fuel oil bill which would put a damper on any day but this one is already shot. I wish the phone would ring and it would be a lawyer saying hey monkey mama some really rich old person you used to know but don't remember died (painlessly and happily after a full and vibrant life) and they left you all their money which is a trillion billion dollars and it has alreaady been deposited into your bank account tax free. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA (a high pitched bordering on needs to be locked up crazy lady laugh)

Yes, I know, money doesn't buy happiness; I have two beautiful healthy children who are smart, in fact brilliant enough to get the potty button out of their book; I have a job, a roof over my head, a vehicle, a hair appointment on Friday, a loving family and food to eat. There, I counted my blessings are you happy now? (smacks own hand) BAD ATTITUDE! Go get ready for work!

So, how are you today? :)


Update: After I posted this and was getting ready for work, I realized that every single bath towel in my house was in the washing machine. I ended up drying off with two hand towels. Then, when I went outside to get in my mommy mini-van, I observed that a large flock of what had to have been gargantuan birds had left special presents for me all over my vehicle. Commence to pity me.

Now I'm at work and they all think I'm just a normal person in her office working happily. BWAH ha!

It's Monday and it's raining really hard and thundering here
Monday, March 28, 2005

It may look like I am awake and typing this but really I'm just functional enough to sit upright at my desk. Why am I so sleepy?//Since everything* started I have vowed not to say anything bad about my ex husband in front my children. And since they might read this one day I will simply state that he called at about 5:30 pm yesterday to tell them "Happy Easter." He wanted me to "put them on the phone so he could talk to them." Um, they're 2 years old and they hardly talk at all. And that is all I will say about that.

Okay so aaaaaaanyway, new topic. I am not saying this to make you feel pity for me, but if that is a side effect of your reading this I really can't control that now can I? I have the bad bad feeling that my computer will be dead soon. (If you're new to my blog you don't know that I appealed to my readers for financial assistance in the purchase of a new computer, so see the side bar at left to read the whole sad story.) The reasoning behind this morbid assumption stems from a couple of things. One, I tried to defrag it and it won't defrag. Every time I try I get an error message that part of the C drive is inaccessible. What? Then, to top things off, we finally got DSL here. But when I tried to install DSL on this puny little machine, I found out that it had no network card. I didn't know what that meant or if it was even capable of getting one and if so how much would that cost bc I didn't want to spend alot money I don't have adding something onto a computer that will probably be inoperable soon.

When I took it to the local computer shop, I was a little embarrassed. Luckily I semi-know the lady who owns it so I explained to her that it was given to me, I know it's a pathetic little thing, blahblahblah but could she make it DSL compatible and if so how hard would we be hittin my wallet? I have to say she did not outwardly smirk at my sad computer she simply took it apart and said, yeah I can put the ethernet(?) thingy in here for 30 bucks, but do you hear that sound? she asked. What sound?? I replied with a cracked little voice. That loud grinding sound coming from inside the computer. Yeah, I answered, whispering in a scared fashion. That's the fan and the __________ (fill in some computer word I don't remember.) That's not normal? I asked. Oh no, she laughed heartily. That's real bad. (me)Well, what can you do, I mean, is it gonna explode or what? I told her about the whole defragging thing. That's not good, she tells me. Uh-huh.

She takes it in the room in the back where they hook all the wires up and analyze stuff and make weird gestures with their eyebrows which by the way makes the computer owner very uncomfortable. How bad is it? I ask. No response. How much more time do we have together? I plead. Her answer, "There's nothing I can tell you for sure about how much longer it'll hold up. Could be 3 hours, could be 3 days, 3 weeks, shoot, maybe 3 years." (me, hopefully) 3 years? (her) Yeah but I seriously doubt it. (me thinking out loud to her) Nice.

So that, people, is the deal. The grand total I have so far in the computer fund is.........drumroll please..........$30.50. Yes, that is how much some nice people have given me. So just think, if 969.5 more nice sympathetic people have pity on me and send me 1 buck each, I will get a new computer!!! Isn't that exciting??!!! Plus I have about 20 auctions ending in 2 days or so on Ebay which should help a little.

Additional random things: Did anyone see Crossing Jordan last night who can tell me what happened after Bug got hit in the head bc that's when I fell asleep.

Speaking of falling asleep, I would like to note that I have slept for four straight nights now without any pharmaceutical assistance. That is a big thing for me bc I have not been able to sleep without medicine, and sometimes even the medicine doesn't make me sleep, since everything* happened. Will this exciting pattern continue?

On Saturday I talked to my new friend Renee on the telephone! That's the first time I have heard the actual voice of someone I met online. Cool. (Hi Renee.) She can testify that I am a real person and that I babble on incessantly in real life as well.

Okay I think that's all for now. It has taken me like 3 hours to write this in between my jobstuff. The nerve of some people to interrupt me.

*meaning the implosion of my entire existence caused by the behavior of the person to whom I used to be married

Cracked like eggs
Sunday, March 27, 2005

Easter was a windy, cold, yet fun filled day here in Monkeyville. The rain held off just long enough for the after church egg hunt. Lily and Hannah had to bodyslam a few kids off to get their baskets filled to the max. Just jokin! Afterwards we had a yummy dinner at mom's and watched the monkeys romp with the baby starlet Ava E. For more exciting action click this photo album link for a slideshow adventure! Sorry I'm slack but I did not feel like captioning every photo...if you want to know something about a specific picture, just ask! More tomorrow and hope everybody outside Monkeyville had a fun filled Easter as well.

PS Here is a funny link just for my sister. (But you can look too.)

Easter Egg Me- just playing around w special effects on Picasa



No rabbits come back to life.
Saturday, March 26, 2005

(Shout out to my cousin Steve in Hawaii who just found my blog!- exciting:))

It's late and I'm crazy exhausted. I've been going hard all day long. I cooked today for the shut-in/elderly meal delivery program at our church. That took the afternoon. Then my mom had been spazzed up about what we're having for Easter dinner tomorrow. My sis and her hub and kid wil be here for church etc. We had to go right after dinner to the store to get all the extra stuff for the food tomorrow. With family friends all about 12-13 adults and 3 rug rats at my mom's house. Round these parts in Monkeyville holidays mean food and serious food, not any wimpy stuff. Ya gotta have much more than anyone could actually eat.

We're having spiral cut ham, crab cakes, sweet potatoes, little red potatoes, roast asparagus, green bean casserole, marinated bean salad, fried apples, stewed tomatoes, sour cream biscuits and whatever else I can't think of right now. Here's the marinated salad I made tonight to soak
overnight.veggiesalad Then I had to get the stuff together for the monkeys easter baskets, which really aren't alot of candy, mainly stuff they can use but definitely has to include a chocolate bunny and two monkeys. Also, books, sand digging toys, sunglasses, a cup w straw in the shape of a big chubby bird with a hat on, stuffed bunnies, and bunny ears.goodeaster
Also some totally radical Easter matchbox cars if you can tell in the front there. You can click to make it bigger.

With all the hustle and bustle and preparation for dinners, and what new outfit everyone will wear to church, we lose track of the real meaning of Easter until we rush around and get to church then hurry to sit down and get everyone straightened out and looking spiffy. Then we look up and see the Easter lilies, hear the songs, the Easter message, and get a reminder that it was Jesus, not Peter Cottontail who rose from the dead.

I ashamedly admit that each year I find myself I buying into the commercialism that Christ's death has become. I was in Target and I was looking at all the rows and rows of Easter stuff- things that I would never even have imagined. Plastic hens that lay bubble gum eggs, 20 types of chocolate rabbits, jellybeans, easter candy and toys of all shapes, colors, and sizes. I was consumed with the commercial excitement of buyingbuying buying until I stopped to think and a true feeling of sadness overwhelmed me. Where was Jesus in all this?

I searched and searched to find something- anything that represented the true Easter message. On the last aisle at the very bottom in a small box were some chintzy looking chocolate flavored crosses in foil boxes. Is this what Our Savior has been reduced to-a little hidden box in the back corner of Easter? Don't let us do that to Him.

Through all the chocolate wrappers and marshmallow peeps, seek a vision of the first Easter, of Christ dying on the cross and coming back to life after three days. It's true you know. Chocolate melts, eggs spoil, but the Word of the Lord endures forever.

If you have a minute check out a few of my favorite flash presentations. I think you'll dig 'em. Make sure your speakers are on. Maybe you've seen these before but each time I watch they mean something new.
Click here for Presentation 1
Click here for Presentation 2
Click for Presentation 3

Happy Easter!


I see you in the diffused morning sunlight, hair wild from sleep, skin so pale and smooth, oblivious to my inspection. I love your ringlets, your chubby fingers, and rosy lips, and I thank God for you, and I want to put you in a bubble and keep you with me and protect you forever from the harsh world.

Contains FD&C Red # 1- 1million
Friday, March 25, 2005

Okay so whenever I'm at the grocery store I'm always looking for any cool new foods the girls might like. They're not picky eaters, as a matter of fact they love all healthy foods mommies would want babies to eat. Veggies are their fave, and they will eat carrots, green beans, mixed vegetables, all that straight out of the can. (Not literally people, but you know, like room temperature.) They dig bananas, sliced apples, applesauce, canned fruit in natural juice, strawberries, and their absolute favorite is blueberries. Cheese is a fave- all kinds- American, cheddar, havarti, brie, Laughing Cow, it's all good. However, I try to keep a little variety goin' on with some new stuff every now and then, especially for breakfast. Lately they have been stuck on wanting dry cereal, which is not bad, but eventually they'll get sick of it and we need to have alternatives.

Yesterday while perusing the freezer section at our local grocery, I noticed these Pillsbury French Toast Sticks with little cups of syrup that you dunk them in. Plus, they were on sale. Okay so syrup is nuttin but sugar but they rarely eat sweets, as a matter of fact they can't stand candy, but they looove dipping things in stuff. When we go to McD's for a treat, they are all about dipping fries and nuggets in ketchup. I thought they would like the french toast sticks because they like pancakes, but I figured they wouldn't go for the syrup.

I had gotten them up and in their high chairs with their juice because they like to watch me fix their food. I put the french toast sticks in the toaster bc they were like a piece of bread that you toast then tear into pieces along the perforations. Of course I'm narrating this the whole time "Mmmmm mommy got you something new and yummy for brekky (short for breakfast fyi) it smells mmmm so good, look I'm puttin' it in the toaster oh yeah this looks super duper uh huh uh huh" (you know you gotta get em psyched up for something new so they will at least try it.) I take out the little syrups. "Oh wow check this out girls it comes with little cups of ...." pause to stare in amazement/shock/disgust- what the heck...? the syrups are all BRIGHT NEON COLORS.

I know this may be normal for people who have lots of kids and feed them junk food all the time but call me crazy we're pretty healthy eaters and I am not used to the thought of consumption of massive quantities of concentrated food dyes. I know they probably did that to make kids want to eat it but please that is totally groty to k8.

It's too late; the rainbow death syrup has been spotted by the young primates and they're screaming bloody murder for it. I consider the colors available to decide the lesser of evils. Blue, mmm, no. Green, hmm, don't think so dudes. I decide to go with the red seeings as it's the closest to the real color of syrup and it's the only one you can actually see through. Plus, my kids hate sweets so they're not gonna eat it anyway.

Place plates in front of young mammals- they examine, smell, look at the goods. Gingerly poking the syrup cups they tentatively take a bite of a plain piece. I'm thinking-good, they just want the bread part, not the sugar. I turn to prepare my coffee and a few seconds later check the situation. BAAADOW BABY it's red syrup mania! Within a matter of seconds they have tasted and begun relishing the thick red contents of the cup that looks like finger paint. And they in fact have decided that finger paint is a great alternative use for this stuff. There is great dipping, pouring, smearing, rubbing, licking, and general revelry for an extended period as they grunt their way through the stick eating process and when all sticks are gone they continue making sure they get every last drop of the red goop.

I am unintentionally, yet officially a mother who feeds her children sugar and red dye. And they love it. I feel so guilty. The organic tofu hotdog mommies will make me wear a Scarlet Syrup A on my shirt so the world will know I gave my children liquid candy for breakfast. Quick, hide me.

A mossy post

mossybird My dad is a wood carver. He makes birds, animals, and all other assorted doodads --- whatever crosses his mind at the time. His pineapples are really cool. He takes the rejects or whatever and mounts them along this long splitrail fence that runs down the road beside our property. The fence is aged a really cool grey with some moss & stuff growing on it and the birds age along with it. He also makes these birds attached to long flexible pieces of metal and drills a hole, then mounts them like on a pole or gatepost. When the wind blows, the bird looks like it's flying around.

Sweet Savior

Wanna hear a song I really like? Go to itunes and search for the song Untitled Hymn by Chris Rice. Download it and listen to it w headphones on when you can concentrate without a whole lot of distraction and background drama going on.


(whispering) it's 8:47 am and i just woke up. i cannot believe this. there is no sound at all coming from the monkey cage. they never sleep this late. thank you Lord for 2 extra hours of sleep. ttyl it is
Thursday, March 24, 2005

my hair

I so totally have to do something with my hair. I've been procrastinating and now it's past the point of control. The next available appt is next Friday. I hope I can make it til then.I knew you wouldn't believe how bad it is so I had the girls take my picture to show you. Yikes! (And this is after I shampooed and styled it the best I could.) Should I wear a hat or what??

A stick from a British chick

I had no idea of what I was getting myself into when I started this whole blogging bit. The original intention was just monkey updates for friends and family. Now I'm sharing my whole life with the world. I wonder if anyone is reading this who I knew from like high school, college, where I used to live. (If you're one of the two college roommates who owes me backrent money, don't you think it's about time you paid me back? I'm sure you probably have a real job by now.)

I didn't realize how attached I am to this little bit o' cyberspace until I logged on this morning and (gasp of horror) I could not get my blog to load and it said error. Refresh refresh refresh. Panic set in. Some of those geeky hacker kids broke into my site and vandalized it! Those hoodlums! Those sons of guns! How dare they!

So I emailed Echo and asked her if she could see my site. Why did I do that, disturb her perfectly happy morning home w her kids because I'm having a panicattackdotcom? Is there a term for blog obsession? I should coin one.

blogomania n: The compulsive obsession to update, view, comment or otherwise involve one's self constantly with online web journals. ex. K8 suffers from such an extreme case of blogomania that when she got a website error on her blog, she had to be medicated immediately. See also blogophobia, blogophilia.

Of course I'm exaggerating. As a matter of I have more friends now. Cool people. I think there should be an annual worldwide blog reunion so we all meet each other in person?Or would that ruin the mystery/magic? Not for me cause what you read here is what you get baby.

I look forward to my unwind time in the evening after the girls are in bed and I can blog & read other ones. Or like right now at work. I've been typing this in between what I have to do/people I have to see. Helps calm my brain on busy days.

Gettin down to business here-this is what started my bloggy thoughts- Fizzy told me she threw a stick at me. Not being familiar with this term, I thought she was just a little bonky. Then I found out it's like a questionaire thingy. Something that makes you think. Oy vey amigos.
Here it is...

You are stuck inside
Fahrenheit 451, which book do you want to be? I guess this means what book would you want to memorize? I would choose the Book of Matthew from the New Testament of the Bible.

Have you ever had a crush on a fictional character? Yeah, Jessica's boyfriend from the Sweet Valley High Series- does anyone remember those?

The last book you bought is: The Little Engine That Could for the girls,
I Don't Know How She Does It by Allison Pearson for myself. (I actually downloaded it from I give it 5 stars- I loved it.

The last book you read was: The same as above. Actually read, as in paper book, was last night to the girls before bed- 5 Silly Monkeys. (true, I promise)

What are you currently reading? I just downloaded a book but I can't remember the name ; I haven't started it yet. When I have time I read little snippets of
My Utmost for His Highest and flip through whatever magazines my mom left on the kitchen table- Good Housekeeping(ha) Southern Living Prevention

Five books you would take to a deserted island:1. My
Bible. 2. Caravans by James Michener 3. A Robert Frost Anthology 4.The God Chasers by Tommy Tenney 5. She's Come Undone by Wally Lamb

I noticed
Echo mentioned The Purpose Driven Life on a recent post. That book is great. It's getting even more publicity now bc of the whole Atlanta Courthouse killings thing. Audible is giving a free download of the chapter she read to the guy. Click this link. It has the whole story there too.

I almost forgot...I'm chunkin this stick at Renee, Shanee, and Echo. I hope it doesn't hit you in the head.

Rodent Trivia
Wednesday, March 23, 2005

Q. What do you do when you are transferring your clothes from the washer to the dryer and you look down and there is a moist dead mouse laying on the door of the dryer?

A. I don't know, ask my sister. HA!

A Monkeyville Morning

I have been seeing all these photo memes going around the blogosphere. Being the rebellious crazywoman that I am, I decided to invent my own self produced saga which will be similar to a meme but will also semi-answer Echo's question- "What is a day in Monkeyville like?" Today I feature photos taken during my morning escapades. I think escapades is a much more exciting word than "getting ready and driving to work," don't you? And it's much shorter to say. Let the escapades begin.
PS Escapades reminds me of Ice Capades. I always wanted to go there. The commercials made it look so thrilling and chilling. Do they still have that? If not I'll settle for Disney on Ice.

This is a view of my bathroom. I took it at an angle to give it more of an "artsy fartsy" look. If you tilt your head to the left, the top is my ceiling and the bottom is my shower curtain. My ex is really creative and he covered the ceiling and some parts of the walls with bamboo he cut, dried,and sawed to fit. And so the shower curtain follows the whole tropical motif. I vacillate between wanting to redo the bathroom bc it's a constant reminder of him, or not changing it because it really is cool. I dunno.

my fave cup
This is my favorite travel mug in which I took coffee to work this am. Also, I must have Splenda and lots of it. I prefer my coffee to be at the point where it would almost choke you. They don't make it strong enough in my office but if I'm desperate and don't have time to get mine ready, I will drink their coffee water.

purse n keys
This is an exciting photo of my purse and keys and cell phone right before I scooped them up and ran out the door.

pre monkey wreckers rooom
This is a shadowy shot of my living room this morning. Note that the TV and DVD are mounted up on the wall at left like in a psych ward HA! The monkeys kept climbing up on the tv so it had to go. Note the climber taking up an area where an adult chair could go. Seriously, this is how the girls got the name monkeys because as soon as they could they started climbing anything and everything they could. I got the climber because I read on a Mommy's forum that if you give them something they're allowed to climb, they will chill on the other stuff. It worked like about 85%. After the monkeys are up and roaming it will look like a toybomb exploded.

end of driveway
Here's the end of my driveway and what I see. It was raining this morning. It's peaceful & serene where I live.

onthe way
On my way out to the main highway, I see this grain silo. Another nouveau angle shot- what can I say- I'm tragically hip.

my warhol attempt
My warhol attempt- the girls at 6 months. It's on the wall between two diplomas in my office.

monkeys at work
Monkeys at work- the shelf over my main desk. They're bobbleheads and super cute!

guilty pleasure
My guilty pleasure, my secret addiction...People magazine. We get it every week at work and I must read it to see what's hot and what's not, of course. It's my only connection to the real world of pop culture. My fave section is the fashion section when they have either Winner's Circle or What Was She Thinking? Then we all read the trends on what lipgloss, purses, and toilet paper the celebs are using so we can be all like "That is REE-DIC-YOU-LUSS, paying 500 for one tube of lipstick. Dag, I wish I was rich like that."

Thus ends the saga of my morning what else do you wanna see??

Hey yeah and if you're in Australia or New Zealand can you please introduce yourself? I want to meet you.XOXOXO

Rub a Dub Dub Monkey Kids in the Tub
Tuesday, March 22, 2005

Originally uploaded by Monkey Mama.

Bath time is crrrrrrraaaaaazzzy time round these parts. As soon as the monks hear me start the water to scrub out the tub, they come running. Yes, I scrub the tub before their bath cuz I'm germaphobic like that. I know I'm the only person who used it but I don't care, it has to be squeaky clean for the booboo bears.

Then we absolutely must must must remove all clothing immediately or we will just die. Off with the shirt, pants, socks, and diapers. I have to get em in there quick so they don't pee on my lovely berber carpet. The orange thingys in their ears are plugs because they have tubes in their ears. I like to give them cool mohawks and crazy horns when I'm shampooing so they can laugh at each other.

Proceed with splashing, pouring of water, squeezing of tub toys, scrubbing selves w washclothes, paddling like little fishies, etc.etc. Must scream NONONONONONO when it's time to get out even though toes look like shrivelled little albino raisins. Dry off, lotion times 2, pullups, and we're off. It's a system people, a well oiled machine.


Originally uploaded by Monkey Mama.

It's weird how the girls look so different in these 2 pics. Lil looks chubby and Hannah's little ribs are visible.In reality, they are exactly the same height and weight. And they both eat unbelievable quantities of food.

This is a picture of Echo...

This is a picture of Echo.
Originally uploaded by
Monkey Mama.
...and this is my new template! I love it more than homemade brownies which is a whole whole whole lot.


Originally uploaded by Monkey Mama.

Instant blabbering- just take away the Mommy. Of course that's Hannah.

This is what's happening at the monkey palace right now.

I don't go in to work til 12 today so, ha, silly old me, I thought I would get some more stuff on ebay in the couple of hours I have left of the a.m. When the girls got up, they refused to put pants on. Now you can say"A 2 year old can't refuse to do something-you can make them do it." Yes, I could have held them down and put the pants on them but I don't feel like it - I'm off work this morning! Plus, if you're a mommy, you know that you pick your battles, and this is not one I care to fight.

So, I gave them juice and cereal, and turned on the TV. O-MA-GOSH YOU DID WHAT??!!? Don't even go there okay, because I could have sent them to their playgroup place/babysitter this morning and had the house to myself to do whatever I want but NO I kept them here with me so stop it. And they only watch Noggin which is educational when they watch TV at all.

They were okay at first, before I came back here into my room over the gate, we played, we kissed, we snuggled, etc. As soon as my foot hit the floor in my room- waaaaaah! Nothing wrong. It's like a switch. I go over the gate back out, they stop yelling. I get back over the gate they start. So I am ignoring them and typing this in between listing stuff on ebay. Can you hear them??? I thought so.

Jammin in the Cheerios

This is them happpily consuming cereal before I left the area. In case you're wondering they like to dump the cereal and spread it out, then eat each piece separately. And yes, I have to vacuum alot.

More than once a day.

Jammin in the Cheerios
Originally uploaded by Monkey Mama.

Gettin all religious on ya...and other stuff
Monday, March 21, 2005

Yesterday was Palm Sunday which for us Christian peeps is the start of Holy Week. That's the week before Jesus was crucified, Easter and all that. Here's a good link to explain. You can scroll up and down on that link to read the rest if you like. The kids in church paraded around during the first song waving palm leaves. They were so precious. I think Holy Week is like hooking a big jumper cable to your faith and the other end to a big Jesus electric socket. You start to think about the whole situation and if you're me, start feeling like I need to get it together, but in a good way, not bad. If you don't go to church why don't you watch the Passion of the Christ if you haven't seen it? I think I'll rewatch it sometime this week.

I have ab-so-loot-lee got to get this stuff on eBay tonight. If you have twin girls who will be wearing like anywhere from 6 to 12 months you will dig my auctions. If you email me and prove that you're not a psycho stalker I'll send you my ebay id so's you can check them out.

Oh yes and on the template tip it's full speed ahead maybe tomorrow -I'm so excited because this site will look totally different- like a REAL LIVE PROFESSIONAL blog like the big kids have. Did I mention I'm psyched? Can you tell I have no life? Pity me people, if you must but I can't wait. Did you know this dude wrote a whole book about Blogs and the "Blog culture?" I saw it on I should so totally be in the second edition, don't you think? bah-bye now.(flight attendant voice- whoopsie no offense Katherine!) XO

Red Velvet Monkeys
Sunday, March 20, 2005

Originally uploaded by Monkey Mama.

Can I brag and tell you I got both these suits for 5 bucks + shipping on eBay last summer? They're not what I would typically buy but they were like new and so cheap I couldn't resist! They looked like little sweethearts at church today and of course everyone oohed and aahed over em. I don't know if you can tell but they have ribbon rosebuds sewn on the collars. Okay, enough of that.

Excitement is a word that doesn't even start to describe how I felt when I checked my email earlier and Echo had sent me a mock up of my new blog design!!! I have been through so much CRUD trying to get a new template (not with her) but I had problems with the first company I hired (and prepaid I might add) and ended up with NADA from them - no design, no money back, plus alot of attitude. Not a good experience. Why I didn't just go w/ Echo first I will never know. My life would have been sooo much easier.

And all I did was send her some graphics and basic ideas and she came up with the bomb design. Sorry you'll have to wait a little longer to see this masterpiece!

Anywasy about eBay, it takes me so long when I start listing stuff to get my template setup, load photos, blahblah. So today I got a grand total of 1 big listing up out of the maybe 50 I need to do. I put a Buy It Now on it just for the heck of it and lo and behold, somebody snapped that sucker up in like 2 hours. Alright! That inspires me to keep on trucking. Tomorrow I will get at least 8 more auctions up. It's worth it in the end but it's just all the stuff you have to do to get the listings up and I'm a perfectionist so I don't finish until everything looks exactly like I want it. I've found that the better the auction looks, the more people will pay.

Here's a super fast recipe I threw together tonight and it was sooo good (don't ask me ask my people) that I thought I would share it with you guys. Not exactly gourmet, but a quicky dinner that tastes great!

Take one pack of the precooked chicken strips southwest flavor heated up, one pack of the precooked Mexican/Spanish rice, heated up, and one can of the new Campbells Green Chile? condensed soup, and if you like it spicy, one can of chopped green chiles. Mix it up real good and wrap it up like filling inside the soft taco(small) size tortillas, either kind. Line em up like enchiladas in a rectangular pyrex or 9 x13 dish. Pour some red sauce all over it and spread around- I used the Pace Ranchero Cooking Sauce- you could use enchilada sauce, salsa, taco sauce, whatever you like. Green salsa would probably be good too. Then if you want put cheese - I used pepper jack- and bake at 375 til bubbly and cheese is melted. Mmmm mmmm good. Of course you can adapt it to your personal taste- vegetarian- use 2 packs of rice and no meat, you could use cooked shrimp cut up instead of get the picture. It would have been even better with some shredded lettuce, tomatoes and sour cream on top.

I have not forgotten about all the questions. I'll be working on those this week. Buenas noches everybody and may yer Monday be more like a Friday, or at least a Wednesday!

Ebay delay.

I'll try to post tonight. I'm trying to get some stuff on Ebay while the girls are asleep!

Saturday, March 19, 2005

The baby starlet Ava E. Posted by Hello

Diapers & Dollar Bins

Hey what's up people- I've been away at a doctor's appointment all day today and it's late. Thank God for "Uncle Bob and Aunt Sue Bear" who keep my kids ALL DAY AND NIGHT when I have to go somewhere. (Nothing is near here.) Not only do they keep the monks alot, they take them out to eat just about every Friday night. How about that?

My mom went with me today and I had to go by Sam's Club and get 2 cases of diapers and wipes. Having twins a lot of the time you have duplicates of everything in your cart, and people going by and especially the cashier are always buggin' like... hmmmm? I always have to say "Twins." You'd think folks would figure it out. But hey, it gives me a chance to whip out the photos. Believe me, a cart piled up with diapers and baby wipes is the ultimate dude magnet. HA!

We went by to see my sister afterwards. Which brings me to another couple of questions-two of the ones that Echo asked-How many siblings do you have?- Do you have any nieces or nephews? You already know about my bro and I also have a sister who is 28. She and her hub have that cutey patootey up there- baby Ava who will be 1 in April. My sister teaches middle school math. As I mentioned in my 100 things, she is the cutest- basically a walking Barbie. We're definitely on different ends of the genetic pool. She and my brother look more like each other and my mom , and I look like my dad.

When she was born, I was so jealous and I didn't want her. For some reason when she came home from the hospital,everybody who came to see her had to wear one of those masks over their mouth and nose. I remember sneaking in the room when no one was looking and pulling my mask down and breathing real heavy in her face. Give me a break- I was only 4! Anyway, I'll have to give you more info on this chick tomorrow when my brain is not about to shut down.

We all went to Target together and my mom got the girls the sweetest tank tops- they're hot pink with a little strawberry on the front that's clear plastic sewn on with glitter inside. I got the girls each a board book from the dollar section at the front. Don't you love the Target dollar bins? Every time you go in there there's something new & cool in that section. Guess what else I got? A cute little purple post it pad made in the shape of a computer and the screen says LUV 2 BLOG. Cute and cheesy! Love it.

Okay- about to fall asleep. More random babbling tomorrow. ;)

Friday, March 18, 2005

This is what Lily does when you start singing that Move to the Music song from Noggin- All around the Kitchen by Dan Zanes bc she likes the part where he says "turn your arms into wings---now flap those things!  Posted by Hello

Couldn't resist showing ya this shirt. Posted by Hello

Monkey Flashback
Thursday, March 17, 2005

Snuggle Monkeys 12/04 Posted by Hello

Bonus Footage: Grandpa teaches monkeys how to eat Oreos.
Wednesday, March 16, 2005


Let the fun begin!

(New you have a buck for me? ->see sidebar)
If you're a regular you will get sick of seeing this so just learn to ignore it.

Hey you. Have you read the post below this one called Get to know me, amigos? (You can read it and come back here if you want.) I want to know what youse guys would like to know about me, questions that have come up for you reading my blog, anything about me, my kids, my life, etc. So far I have 2 lonely (but good!) comments so get to work and send me your questions/ inquiries etc.

I'm going to start answering...

Anonymous said...
What about your wonderful siblings? I hear your brother is the coolest guy in the world......

Well hardy har har! I wonder who this anonymous little commenter is! Let's see- my brother. He's two years older than me and he lives in the Southeast US. Like I said in my 100 things, he works for the government but that's all I can tell you or he'd have to kill you. He is like a super fanatical firearms expert type dude who even makes his own bullets, which to me is unbelievable crazy cuz like what if the gunpowder blew up or something? He teaches people to shoot stuff too. I guess shoot at stuff and hit it would be a better description. He only comes home to Monkeyville like once or twice a year because he's too busy working and doing law enforcement stuff and taking classes to find out how to shoot more stuff better and learning how to protect our dear country against those terrorists. When were having all those terrorist threats alot on all the national monuments he would get called from his regular job to do special assignments like once he went to guard the St. Louis Arch and he was driving a Hummer and holding this big semi automatic weapon that looked like something GI Joe uses. I know becasue he emailed us pictures. Not making this up. He is a computer whiz too and can freak you out when he's home and you ask him to check your computer and he picks it up and cracks it open like a nutshell and starts pulling all the guts out and rearranging them.

On the personal tip, he gets a girlfriend and keeps her until she starts telling him she wants to get married or else and then he does the or else part. My mom is all like "When are you gonna reproduce???" He has bizarre musical taste that ranges from Joan Osborne to Motley Crue to this weird Celtic band I can't remember the name of that plays at those festivals where people dress up like knights and stuff. But I don't think he dresses up like that. He has really big hairy feet that we have nicknamed "the Hobbit feet" and he likes to play the air guitar with his eyes closed and squinting like "Dude this Scorpion tune is hittin'."

And he's really smart - he got a double bachelor's and a Master's and I think he wants to get a Doctorate too. When he comes home we revert to childhood and he does stuff like come up behind me and pluck my head and I do stuff like come up behind him and kick the back of his kneecap except now he like spins around and gets you in a kung fu death grip in less than a second and I think he can kill a man with one finger but I'm not sure. He's a granola who likes to wear Tevas and hike for fun and sleep out in the woods and hunt wild boar. He likes to eat raw chocolate chip cookie dough. I guess that's all I can think of for now. Here's a picture of him at some training thing rapelling down a building and I think it's okay to post because you can't really see him or tell where he is.

OK what else do you all want to know?

PS Okay now send me some money rich boy!

Go Go Power Ranger!

Get to know me better, amigos.
Tuesday, March 15, 2005

(New you have a buck for me? ->see sidebar)
If you're a regular you will get sick of seeing this so just learn to ignore it.

Alright, since Echo went and wrote this interesting post with lots of cute pix, it gave me blog envy. I have been wanting to post today, but really I don't want to write unless I have something interesting to say. I want this blog to be more than just a journal or diary and it's just not my thing to write a post that says "I really have nothing to say, everything here is boring and the same, whine whine blah blah." Not right now anyway. Perhaps one day I will run out of things to say and will post something that sounds like that. (By the way, when I do that, please cyberslap me, people.)

This all got me to thinkin' -why are the popular blogs popular? Okay, think of the most popular/well known blog that pops into your head. I'm thinking Dooce and ljc fyi. What is it about these two blogs, that are completely different yet successful, that makes them something people keep coming back to? Dooce- humorous stories, told with a smartalecky twist, but also you have the mushy love factor mixed in there, and you have a continuing story line- baby Leta. Ljcfyi - this is a cute blog, no obscenity, short funny entries, updated regularly, ongoing story lines with the pets, crafts, adventures w hubby. Her graphics are super adorable as well. And The Daily Echo - ongoing story, unique skins, humor, endearing little stories about the babies, pictures, more.

With all these blogs you have a feeling that you know these people even though maybe you only read them and never even comment. You have a specific idea of where they live, what the inside of their houses look like, it's like dude- you're there.

So what is my point here? I am not saying my goal is to become a "big name" blog like these so don't be like "you're a cheesy wannabe cool blogger." But I do think that the readers who come here regularly have just a little glimpse into my life. I want the people who do come here to find something that makes them want to return. Corny? Maybe. Truthful? Definitely. Here's my deal. Right now I am not comfortable stating exactly where I live so that's out of the question. And I won't say anything specific about my job because it's a professional position and I respect my employers. So those are my only limitations. Everything else is fair game. Some people reading this are family and friends who know me personally, or not so personally. Some people only know what I have written on this blog. Some are in between.

So what do you want to know about me, my kids, my house, my car, my life specifically? Don't be afraid to ask me anything. If I'm not comfortable telling you, I'll say so. Come on people, lurking readers, you can even do it anonymously if you want to. Once I get questions, I will start posting the answers and pictures to go with them if you want.

On that note I decided I will start taking pictures regularly around here in Monkeyville so you can have glimpses into my everyday life, what I see, what I do, the people I meet. Thus the pictures below of our excursion this afternoon to the local coffeeshop. After we stopped there, I went to the drugstore to pick up some prints I had ordered from Ofoto. They give you like 10 prints free when you join and you have to use em or lose em. You can get them mailed to you or pick them up locally. Cool.

By the way, Monkeyville is:
North of Florida
South of Maine
East of the Mississippi River
A rural area, but within driving distance(1-2 hours) to urban areas.
A place where your kids can play outside and ride their bike on Main Street.
A place where, corny as it may sound, a man's handshake is still as good as his signature.
A place where you may have to slow down to pass a tractor on a narrow backroad, or wait for a neighborhood dog to trot across the street.
A place where there are never any traffic jams.
A place where everybody waves to everybody when they pass on the road, whether they know them personally or not. (this freaked out my husband when we first moved back here bc he grew up in the city)
All this sounds too good to be true, but it really is.

At the Monkeyville Coffee Shop/Book store they have cool toys for kids to play with while their mommies get a caffeine fix.

Hannah and Lily especially like the Brio train set.

The monkeys amp it up with a iced mocha- double shot of course. (Just kidding- it's chocolate milk fixed by our fave barista/babysitter - Miss Carole Ann!)

Mmmm mmmm good! Posted by Hello

Hannah Grace- a coffee shop philosopher. Posted by Hello

Lilypie 1st Birthday Ticker
Who's the Monkey Mama?

Location: Planet Twinstar, Monkeyville, United States

I'm a real live human person...the slightly wacky mom of 6 year old identical twin primate princesses and one 2year old monkeyboy. I'm divorced from a crazy baboon and remarried to a big snuggly gorilla. I thank God daily for my wonderful family and friends, without whom I would go berserk. My chirren are the cutest kids ever born (besides yours) and if you don't believe that you obviously need to see a shrink.

How is she feeling?

The Monkey Mama's imood is
My Unkymood Punkymood (Unkymoods)

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket


Contact me, the monkey mama. two_wild_monkeysatya

Blogs I Dig & Other Rad Links:

Why not BLOGROLL ME!??

Why not BLOGROLL ME!??

Hit Counter



jungleboogiea1 - I fight fat!




+`- - I fight fat!