Mememememememememme. (Me.)
Tuesday, May 31, 2005

Hmmmmm. From Fizzykins. 10 things I have never done??? Should these be things I want to do or just whatevah?

I will let you guess. 5 I want to do- which ones are they?

1. I have never run with the wolves or danced with the dolphins.
2. I have never marched on Washington with a big banner that says "Free the wild monkeys!"
3. I have never been to the ruins of Pompeii to see those cool frozen in time people.
4. I have never read the entire Bible from front to back.
5. I have never worked as a one of those chicks who walks around department stores spraying people with perfume.
6. I have never jumped out of an airplane.
(This list is hard bc I used to be so extremely naughty. I can't think of alot of stuff I haven't done.)
7. I have never seen Willie Nelson in concert.
8. I have never ever been spit on by a llama.
9. I have never had self control with lemon poundcake.
10. I have never been a person who says "never say never!"

I'm obligated by blogosphere etiquette to tag 3 people. I pick Christi, Sandy, and my nose. JUST JOKING. My sister.

Reader challenge # 2 : What are the captions for these photos??

Friday, May 27, 2005

In Monkeyville, the one thing you must do when someone dies is eat. Alot.

What happens is after the service, which we had at the church, you go next door to the Monkeyville Fellowship Hall where the ladies of the church have prepared a massively huge spread that takes three long tables that look like they will collapse from the weight for the dinner and 2 tables for the all the desserts. And since your nerves have been bad and you haven't eaten all day you suddenly realize you're voraciously hungry and you eat til you feel bloated and immobile. I ate ham, turkey, meatballs, potato salad, macaroni and cheese, baked corn, baked pineapple, congealed salad, bean salad, green beans, and pickled watermelon rind. (It's the South.) Don't even get me started on the desserts- pies, cakes, brownies, cobblers, fruit, yada yada. Red velvet and coconut custard pie. Gug.

Actually, the food (and flowers) start coming as soon as the news hits the street. Everyone starts baking first- there are like three cakes right now in my grandmom's fridge- then cooking cooking cooking. People start coming with fried chicken, ham, bbq, deli trays, rolls, salads, and moremoremore. The unspoken rule is that the family should not have to cook until like 3 days after the funeral at least. All you do is make the iced tea.

I will have to bike approximately 3,592 miles to work off the food.

The service was really nice and happy and sentimental and there was live bluegrass music which is always enjoyable. Of course I was sad too. My sister and Ava and my bro are all home so we're going to da beach tomorrow.

Thank you everybody who left such nice comments. No bull it made me feel better. And if you didn't leave a comment but thought something nice or prayed, thanks too.

ps i have not forgotten about the music meme or the 10 things meme. i'll have my people work on those.

My grandmother's Service was today.

This is the picture I put on the front of the folder I made.

I'll be back tonight.

Sharing with you.
Wednesday, May 25, 2005

I wanted to share some pictures of my grandmom that I scanned today. I'm making a collage for her service.
This is her as a child with one of her brothers.

My grandparents with my mom on a trip to NY.

She and my granddad loved to go out on their boat fishing.

gmom and john
Her with my bro about 5? years ago.

She was such a silly silly old girl!! You had to love her. She had a child's heart in her aged body!

Strength, please God.
Tuesday, May 24, 2005

I know you were expecting to come here and see some pictures of my trip or the monkeys, and hear some more stories about silly Tennessee antics, and I wish that was what I was gonna tell you, but unfortunately I write about my feelings and the reality of life which is mostly happy but which some of the time isn't. What I have been through here tonight since I got home from my trip has been the biggest gutwrenching heartbreaking nightmare that I would never want anyone to have to go through. If you're emotionally sensitive or get upset easily you probably won't want to read this post but I have to write it because you all are the only people I have to tell this to. Please do not read if you have a weak stomach; I need to release this though.

We got home and came in my house here, (my mom and I) we were kissing up the babies and giving them their goodies. The lady (Francis) who takes care of my grandmom came to the backdoor and asked if my grandmom was here. (Her house is across the road from mine.) She had come to spend the night like she's been doing and my grandmom didn't answer the door like she usually does. We told her no, she wasn't over here, so my mom went with her to unlock my gmom's house and check on her. About 2 minutes later my mom calls and says come over here right now your grandmom's dead.

I ran out the door and into her house yelling where is she. My mom was crying and pointed in the living room . Evidently my grandmom's aortal aneurysm finally ruptured and she died in her TV chair in the living room. Her pug was going crazy barking and running in circles. My mom was freaking out like what should we do. Luckily Sue who had been keeping the kids is a nurse and she was there. She called my grandmom's doctor who said we didn't have to call the ambulance just the funeral home.

I knew my grandmom who was a neat woman and careful about her appearance would not want anyone coming in her house seeing her like this. Suffice it to say it was not nice and involved blood. I wanted my grandmother to have some dignity even in this state. Though I knew her soul was gone, I still love her and wanted the best for her. We got warm water and soap and a washcloth and I washed her off the best I could. Then I took off her blouse and got a fresh one on her and we moved her to the sofa and put a blanket on her til the mortician came. Everybody was crying and were nervous wrecks. I started crying after I had her all cleaned up and laid down.

You know, there are things we think we could never possibly do, no matter what. But when the time arises, the Lord gives us strength through the Holy Spirit to perservere and do what is necessary. Why didn't you just leave her? you may be thinking. No, I could not do that to this woman- Miss Kitty was what everyone called her- that I love and adore and admire so very deeply. My grandmom has been one of the best people in my life since I was born. To me she wasn't a dead body; she was the grandmother I loved and still love so much this is ripping my heart to shreds.

I pray Lord, that you lift up my mom especially during this time of grief. She is an only child so my dad and my brother and sister and I are all she has left now and I wish I could take her pain away but I know this is what life is about. So bittersweet, so ugly and beautiful, so painful and wonderful. Days like today I scream out to God, not questioning Him, but just in pain and agony knowing He hears and heals and will comfort us through this although things seem impossibly bleak right now.

My grandmom was so so much to so many people, a sweet woman who could be a little feisty when the mood hit her, who had seen alot in her time- overall a kind, gentle spirit. She and my grandfather were my absolute world the whole time I was growing up- really almost like a second set of parents we were at their house next door so much. I already miss her like crazy.

Miss Kitty, I don't know what I'll do without you. I love you forever.

Monday, May 23, 2005

...we fly out in the morning! I am so excited to get home and see my monkey meats! I got them Graceland tshirts today with sparkly pink cadillacs on the front. ha! I will also admit I did end up buying some other Elvis goodies, to be revealed at a later date. I will have to give you all the juicy details when I get home and upload my pictures, but the tour was alot more interesting than I thought it would be. Just as I had suspected, the King was a huge fan of monkeys and there were several located throughout the house. Of course I photographed them don't be silly.

Afterwards my mom and brother who had driven up from MS went downtown to check out the tourist stuff in the yucky yucky heat while I luxuriated in the luscious Memphis weather poolside. I had the whole pool to myself since this is like a business inn type place with no families. It was super- dee-duper.

Now I'm gonna finish packing cuz we out like early in the mornin yo. I hate the rushrush rental car return get to the airport get thru security scene. But I"M GOING HOME TO MONKEYVILLE! Yip.


ps i will wave as i'm flying over your house so stand outside and wait for the plane, k?

Sunday, May 22, 2005

cherub of rock

Struck by disaster on all fronts, corporal.

This afternoon we went to Graceland. Or, I should say, we drove to Graceland. Sweet santa in a sleigh, this whole Elvis thing is bigger than I ever could have possibly imagined. I was thinking, you go there, you walk up, you buy a ticket, you go in on a tour. How difficult could it be? Let me tell ya.

Well, the whole Graceland complex takes up both sides of the highway, which by the way is Elvis Presley Blvd. You park on one side of the highway, and you get shuttled over to the mansion proper. On the parking side, you can take a separate tour of all Elvis' airplanes if you want. There are like 4 or 5.

It was soooooooooooo busy today we could not get in. We're going back tomorrow. I walked over to look over the wall at the house and you can barely see it from the road. But dig this. On the long stone wall outside, and all on the sidewalk, billions of people from all over the world have written all this stuff like messages to Elvis, etc. They cover every square inch. It's totally incredible. I took alot of pictures but why I can't show them to you right now is a whole different issue, which I will address also.

Then since we couldn't get in we went to check out the gift shops. There are many many but if you're a true devotee of the KING you must purchase your Elvis memorabilia from the officially licensed store. I went in two ( licensed & unlicensed by Graceland) and really, Elvis may be dead but people are making an EVERLOVING MINT off of his name, signature and likeness. I thought I had seen merchandising in every form until I saw what I saw today. No wonder Priscilla can afford to have plastic surgery out the yingyang and Lisa Marie can make all the cruddy records she wants and it doesn't matter if they don't sell because they are rich richrichrichrich filthyrich from all the Elvis merchandise.

Of course you had your choice of the usual touristy trap stuff like magnets, keychains, shirts, mugs, postcards, and more, but here is a short list of things that absolutely boggled my mind:

"Nuttin but a Hound Dog" stuffed canines in many colors and species, not just hound. price$10-$50
"Let Me Be Your Teddy Bear" teddy bears in all colors and sizes. $8-40+
Xeroxed plastic wrapped copies of Elvis Aaron Presley's Last Will and Testament $2.99
Candlelight vigil candles with Elvis's Picture and date of birth and death $1.99 (just plain white candles like you buy 10 for a buck and the picture wasn't even printed on, it was a plastic sleeve)
Stuffed replicas of Elvis's favorite horse Risin' Sun $5 and up
Fake Beanie Babies Bears with airbrushed Elvis on tummies, wide variety including young old skinny or fat Elvis $15.00
Elvis Sweet Lips lipgloss (like chapstick) $4
Cookin' w Elvis: Elvis shaped cookie cutter $10, potholder w peanut butter banana sandwich recipe, $8, bottle of Elvis "spices" $10, In the Kitchen w Elvis Recipe Book $15.99
Takin Care of Business Graceland Security Guard Patch $8 (various other TCB logo merchandise also available)
Plastic cat and dog food can covers with pictures of Graceland $3
Graceland- What a Crib! baby bibs blue or pink $8
3Dimensional Graceland mansion puzzle $40.00
DVD Tour of Graceland $40.00
Black or Pink Satin Jacket with Plush Elvis signature on back $80.00+
Plastic Elvis Pocket Tape Measure $2
Graceland Cocktail Shaker $30
Elvis glasses with attached sideburns $13
Lifesize standup Elvis choice of young or old $40

And this really just skims the surface of all the stuff that was in there. There's a sign that says no pictures cuz I was gonna show you inside the store. You may try to bootleg your own unlicensed Elvis crud.

So we did go to some other cool places I'll tell you about when I have time. But not tomorrow during the day anyway cuz we going back to the mansion in the am to get the grand tour.

Now that my bro is here w his laptop GUESS WHAT???? The modem in our room doesn't work and they have no extras. Obviously I'm destined to not post pics til I get home right? Oh well.

One more thing it is craaaaaazy hot here like 90+ every day- I can't stand it- it makes my hair limp.

Saturday, May 21, 2005

I'm still on the lobby computer bc my bro's not getting here til later tonite and I can't post pictures on this cuz it doesn't let you right click or copy and paste. The puppy plans fell thru but we went to eat at a cool Irish pub. The waiter was completely stoned out of his gourd but the food was great. We had a blackened filet mignon with fresh mushrooms and potatoes and veggies w a salad. Mmm mmmm mmm!

Tomorrow the class is over and we're hitting GRACELAND baby. I'm not a big Elvis fanatic but still I think it will be cool to the the King's crib. I will take alot of photos so let me know if you have any specific requests. ha!

In my absence and my sis has dutifully posted monkey pics on her site cuz she was at my house today. Go check em out! Now we're going to Starbucks's to get a goody before we turn in for the nite. TTYtomorrow


Mystery Girl.

LLCoffe asked me what I was doing here. Well see, I don't bring any specifics about my job into my blog cuz I work in the medical field and everything is protected. So I will never be able to tell you on my blog what my title is or what type of work I do. But what I am doing in Memphis is a course for an additional certification for my position. That tells you nothing specific, sorry!

Today is more hands on so it's not quite as bad as yesterday which was almost 100% lectures all day long. Tonight we're going somewhere and doing something- I'm not sure yet - with a lady who is now my friend and my mom's- she's w me (my mom) I forgot to say - we met her at the salon I went to and she's from here and divorced and a Christian and sosososo sweet so I think we're going to dinner or something. Seeings as I have a big mouth I tend to accumulate new acquaintances everywhere I go. Makes life more interesting. She breeds Pomeranians and her dog just had puppies (squeal) I want to see them!!!

End of break. xok8

Afternoon break.
Friday, May 20, 2005

Dear Jesus, Please help me survive these lectures without going legally insane. Amen.

One cool thing was something we got to see in the OR today but I can't tell you what it was or else you would have too much information. I will just say that live surgery is the coolest especially when it's under a camera and you can see it close up on a TV screen. But they really shouldn't have had lasagna for lunch right beforehand. Tonight we're going for some finger lickin' Memphis ribs and shopping at Macy's oh yes that's nice.

Okay break over- ba-bye. Smooches.

Super Duper Quick

Hey dudes! I'm in Memphis and they have a free internet station in the hotel lobby but it's like public so I have to be fast. Starbucks- right across the street, pool, check, fitness center, check. Class- ugh ugh ugh. I'll post tonite and my bro's bringing his laptop tomorrow and the room has internet access.

I have not seen Elvis or any or his impersonators though I did use my super monkey powers to find a salon when I got here to get my toes and brows done. I'm a priss like that. Maybe more at lunch today? These people are corpselike it's hard for me to control my primal urges to blurt out something really loud & bizarre just to see what they would do.


Need. less. stress.
Wednesday, May 18, 2005

Okay, where shall I begin? I'm at work trying to get everything I need to finish finished before I leave. Then my mom calls me at like 1 and tells me remember I was taking your gmom(she's 91) to the doctor this morning bc she was having back pain, well they think it's either her heart or her aortic aneurysm leaking and we're on the way to the Emergency Room. No way I can leave my job bc I have patients til 4. Thank God for Bob and Sue- they go pick up the monks from playcare and I go to the hospital when I get off. They're waiting on test results. Oy vey.

So the doctor comes in and says we can't find any cause for the pain she's having- her heart is fine and her aneurysm is the same so there's no explanation. I'm like, um did you do an xray of her spine seeings as she has BACK PAIN and she has already had one vertebral compression fracture. He looks at me with a "ba-dubba-duuuh" look and says, well yes I guess that would be a good idea. Hello, she's has been here since noon and it's 7pm and you're thinking that's a good idea???? Off she goes back to Radiology. Anyway still nothing. There's no explanation.

So come home, chase children into bath, get them into bed, read books, say prayers, recite Goodnight Moon without which one absolutely cannot go to sleep, then start laundry for trip and slump into computer chair. Gug.

A possible solution has happily arisen for my internet issues. The hotel where I'm staying has high speed access and my brother's coming up to visit while we're there and he's gonna bring his laptop so maybe...otherwise I dunno.

I was planning on doing the music meme tonight but alas, I haven't the energy maybe if I get up early enough in the morning. Plus I haven't hardly gone to read any other blogs in forever. Bad bad k8ykins.

I hope there's a pool at my hotel and a Starbuck's nearby. I hope I get to go to Graceland. I hope I can live without my babies for 5 days. Hey Memphis- r ya ready for me cuz here I come. (If I could sing and/or play piano I would belt this bad boy out like a champ.) Everybody sing along.



Beach Bum Be Me
Tuesday, May 17, 2005

Mmmmmm, da beach. Da sun, da surf, da waves. So sweet.

It was a beautiful gorgalicious day at our lovely local private beach. This friend of my mom owns it and she never uses it so we can go there whenever we want. And it's so lusciously unspoiled and secluded, especially at this time of year. I have been waiting all winter for the feeling of the hot blinding sun on my face as I lay limp and lifeless with my ipod playing Fleetwood Mac's acoustic version of Landslide with the surf gently pounding the shore and the cool breeze blowing in my hair. I needed that so bad. It makes me feel alive and refreshed yet deliciously lazy at the same time. I took some pictures if you want to see but they will proabably bore you out big time cuz they're just nature stuff I thought was cool. Clickykins.

Plus now I'm agitated bc I had planned on blogging thru my cell phone during my Memphis trip which starts Thursday. When I tried a test post today it was rejected by Blogger for some crazy technical jargony reason I didn't understand. So now what am I supposed to do? Go blogless for a everlovin weeeeeeek?(squeal of pain) Nooooooooooooooooo. Not a possibility. Gotta figure something out. Let me know if you hav an idea, k? Le sigh.

In other unrelated news, we had some yummy grilled garlic marinated pork tenderloins and vidalia onions on the bomb Weber grill tonight. Add some romaine salad with balsamic vinaigrette and a crusty loaf of sourdough and BAM BABY you got it goin' on fa real.

And lastly, for my darling Christi, a pic of one of my tattoos she wanted to see. The other one, not so photographical. Ah, the bad old days. Thank God I don't have that trauma drama any more.
Picture 024 Now that I look at the pic, it's not so good bc it looks like alot of it reflected light maybe cuz I was at the beach? I think it looks better than this in reality. Oh well you get the idea. Kids, don't try this at home because eventually you will grow up and have to explain to your children why mommy has a cartoon on her leg that won't wash off, and then later it'll be, mom you have one, why can't I get one? whine whine whine. Yet still I like them. I boggle my own mind. Okay that's all now. Ba-bye.


They're mine, all mine.


ps guess where I'm going today. Hoo-rah. shells

Wow I feel so...special!!!
Monday, May 16, 2005

And loved. And adored. And did I say special? I tied for two categories in the Blogger Awards over at kat's blog. The Mad Skillz best design award isn't mine cuz Echo made my site design so really that goes to her. But will I now have to give out free Depends Undergarments for the other one? I can barely afford PullUps! Yikes.


I'd to thank all the little people who helped me get where I am today. (Well, there's really just 2 little people that have gotten me to the funny farm. ) But still. Gushing.

What do you say to your children's father/ex husband when he calls for the first time in like 2 weeks and wants to know "how they're doing"?????? Umm, let's see, they're still alive and breathing which is basically what you want to know. Why do I even bother trying to go into some details like they're getting their eyeteeth, they're starting to talk ALOT and say silly stuff, they love telephones and playing in the sandbox, when the response is gonna be "Oh really? That's cool. " Did you hear anything I just said?

Everyone tells me I shouldn't but I feel really really bad for my children because they don't have a real dad. The response is typically, well by the time they get to school and start noticing the difference, most of the other kids' parents will be divorced too, or they have other men in their lives who love them, blah blah blah. It's just not the same to me. I'm mad that their dad sucks and won't grow up. It's so unfair to them. But then I think that if I keep them from him, when they get older they will be mad at me because they will want to know why and how and all that other angsty preteen stuff. Last year at the carnival I saw a happy family with the dad carrying the kid on his shoulders and another one with the dad buying the kid ice cream and I got sad and started crying. Most of the time I'm okay but I want my kids to have that too. It's so not fair for them.

Yes I know that there are kids with no parents and kids in orphanages etc etc but these are my kids that I grew myself and I want them to have everything I had as a kid. Don't tell me you're sure they will grow up just fine and they'll be okay cuz I've heard all that a billion times. Why can't I just be mad at the situation sometimes and have that be okay? Roar.

So, tell me what the game pieces look like.
Saturday, May 14, 2005


ps my sister finally remembered how to type and ohmygosh the drama! i lived it live on verizon wireless. check it out.

Get inside my head.
Friday, May 13, 2005

Here's what my brain looks like.rainbow

One cool thing about blogging is getting to know people you otherwise would never meet. I have made lots of happy slappy amigos since I started this blog. Some may claim I'm stalking them but it's not true. How could I ever afford or have time to stalk someone who doesn't live in my immediate vicinity? I mean, get real. But I do like to talk to people on the phone bc I'm a people person and I like to have a voice to connect with the blog. Others prefer to remain unheard by me. sniffles

Along those lines I thought I would share a glimpse into my life with you, my dearhearts. Here're a few little tidbits.
k8podIpod Top 5 (random order)
Voice of Truth (live version) Casting Crowns
O Praise Him David Crowder Band
Fire and Rain James Taylor
Lightning Crashes Live
Lonely No More Rob Thomas

Favorite Beverage (right this minute)
main_photo_newproducts_dietcoke_splendathe new Diet Coke with Splenda

Favorite Eats
grapes red seedless grapes
SC_HeaderBanneredyscoffee flavor light ice cream

Favorite Hair Product
12565746Rusk Thick

Favorite TV Show
48_head5The First 48 on A&E

The Book I'm "Reading" (listening to)
ho_mermaid_chair_050412_tThe Mermaid Chair by Sue Monk Kidd

The Perfume I Always Wear
Estee Lauder Pleasures Intense (just a little spritz then walk into it)

Now picture me wearing perfume, listening to a pink ipod, eating grapes, watching the first 48, and typing on the computer. And oh yeah, wearing my favorite clothes right now.
except long and blue. Fresh Produce is my favorite brand. Soft and comfy.

Like I said...

Echo rules the whole daggon world wide web. Check this out. (scroll down to the 12th product) And pass it on!

Wild Monkey Tea Party
Thursday, May 12, 2005

When: Spur of the Moment
Where: Bedroom next to Kitchen Set
Who's Invited: Selected Babies & Stuffed Animals
Food Served: Pretend Tea, Real Cookies, assorted plastic fruits and veggies
Attire: Pullups or Diapers & Hats Required for Chubby Monkeys
P1010004 The Hostesses (click to bigify)
P1010006 Baby inside (H)
The Aftermath (Clifford the Big Red Dog was evidently forced to toilet train on Potty Time Elmo's Potty. Poor puppykins.)

Hug me.

Okay remember I was telling you that on Thursdays we work in a satellite office? It's like 45 minutes away and we carpool. My boss/owner of where I work drives and he picks us up on the way. My girlfriend and I park our cars together in front of an old store that has an awning in front. We were standing out front waiting today, like kids at a bus stop, and these swallows that have nests under the eaves started freaking out and flying around screaming cuz they thought we were gonna mess w their babies. I think the nests still had eggs bc I didn't see any little birdie heads poking out like this.
We were standing there talking about how beautiful they were when they started totally dive bombing us getting closer and closer in circles. Dude, I was thinking Alfred Hitchcock for real. Then she says, "You've been hit." No way. One had poopooed on me. On my skin. On my collarbone. I didn't even feel it. I was so disgusted I'm sorry - I know it's all natural and organic and all that but it's BIRDPOOP ON ME.

I couldn't bear to look down. I stood like a statue and closed my eyes while she got tissues out of her car and wiped it off. Thank goodness my boss had antibacterial wet wipes in his truck or I honestly don't know if I would have been able to function the rest of the day. I think I have permanent psychological scarring. And another thing- k8 got no sympathy. Everybody was all like oh it's no big deal, why are you so upset? If an evil bird pooped on MY friend, I would completely be giving them the sympathy, you know along the lines of oh I feel so bad for you, yeah that's gross, yada yada. But no. Nothing.

A swallow pooped on me and I need love and pity.

Wild Monkey Flashback-One Year Ago
Wednesday, May 11, 2005

Horrible allergic mosquito reaction

Cutie patootness-resist eating the fat thigh meat!!

We Be Grillin.
Tuesday, May 10, 2005

It is my humble opinion that when it comes to gas grills vs. charcoal, there is no competition. While gas is convenient and faster, nothing compares to the taste of chargrilled meat, people. We had switched to a gas grill for forever but last summer the house we rented at the lake had an old school down home big round luscious Weber charcoal grill. Hooked. Had to get one. I broke it in tonight.

I decided yesterday that everybody was eating here today and k8 was cooking bbq chicken on the grill regardless of nada. I got up this morning; the sun was shining, the birds were chirping. It was a little windy and a wee bit nippy but still nice- nothing to keep you from the gorgeous outdoors. I hauled the girls 3+ miles on the bike after I had my industrial strength coffee. Then I went to work at 1 and when I came out in the late pm it had gotten chilly and windier. Kablooey. Too bad - still gonna grill. After I came out of the tanning bed, it was colder still. By the time I got home and changed my clothes, it was downright blustery dude. Still gonna cook the chicken. Mommy needed the poultry.

Needless to say even w the Kingsford Matchlight it took quite an effort to get the grill going without setting myself on fire. The fire went out twice. I miscalculated the amount of charcoal and had to refill half way but still, it rocked. Really smokey with bbq sauce- that's nice. And for 29 cents a pound, you can't get a more economical way to chow down. I can't wait til the garden starts producing nice veggies to grill and herbs for the marination too.

In other unrelated news, next week I'm outta here on Thursday for Memphis, TN for my job. I will have no choice but to hunt down every internet cafe in the immediate area because there is no possible way I can live without the internet for let's' see... 6 DAYS???!!! Yowza batman- to even consider that makes me a little jittery. I need an Internet Anonymous Group to attend. Does anyone know of a local chapter? And who wants to meet me in Memphis? Just drive on over, down, or up there, no problem.

Anyway, gas vs. do you feel?

I'll never have to pay again.


This only happens on days that start with M and end with Y.
Monday, May 09, 2005

I had alot to tell you but my brain got stuck.

Okay I remember one. Like forever ago, Michael tagged me to play this game where you have this list of occupations and you pick 5 and you fill in the blank If I could be a _______ I would __________... but I couldn't think of anything I wanted to be at the time so I couldn't do it and I figured he thought I was ignoring him, which I wasn't. And I still can't think of anything I want to be but I can think of several jobs I could never do. So here goes...

DISCLAIMER: I'm not saying there's anything wrong with these jobs I'm saying I could never do it and mad props if your occupation falls into one of these categories.

I could never be a masseuse cuz that would be totally gross for me. Having to touch people I don't know like that gives me the heeby jeebies for real.

I could never be a baker cuz I would eat all the frosting.

I could never be a high school teacher (again) cuz a. they don't appreciate you or pay you enough and b. the SOLs are a big box that makes my brain feel trapped and uncreative. I mean, I see where they're coming from but come on people give em some room to breathe.

I could never be a bunny farmer cuz they would all die. Yes, that's right. Snuggles went fishy nightnight today but don't worry he didn't get flushed like the fishies he got buried with his bubby Cuddles.

Tomorrow I have to tell you about what Echo did that made me very very very very happy and special but like I said my brain is still having Monday issues. I will show you some pictures of some stuff we did this weekend. Clickers.

PS in case you misunderstood i am not an internet genius and I did not make my blog design. it was echo echo echo. not only is she a blog genius she also is a creative genius with her bomb card factory and guess what else she makes these awesome collages so go there and buy some cuz she rules. oh yeah and like brandi said click this link and vote for the daily echo that's echo too. she's like all over the internet.

The main problem with my job...

workbunnyget with it snuggles! that there's so much actual work involved.

ps mondays are permanently banned starting today.

Sunday, May 08, 2005

I'm getting ready for church. The weather is so nice here. I'm taking the monks out today after their nap cuz we have a special trailer for mommy's bike. Ours has a cool neon orange flag cuz we roll like dat.
Here's a little treat , not just for moms cuz you know, some dads have to be moms too.

A slice of Middle America

Walmart is the ultimate showcase for greedy American consumerism and I can't stay away. Whenever I'm near one I must venture inside to see what plastic shiny things I cannot live without and marvel at the plethora of products offered for sale that cover every racial, cultural and gender spectrum you could possibly imagine. Tonight was no different.

Things I Resisted Buying:
A t shirt (I'm assuming hockey related) that says "You slice the ice- or pay the price."
A child sized shiny pink papasan chair (I would've had to buy 2 of course)
A elephant shaped peanut butter maker. No lie. It was in the toy section with the Easy Bake Ovens and the Snoopy Snocone Machine.
A neon rainbow pack of plastic Solo cups (that'll shoot the ozone layer all to heck, kids.)
All things Mary Kate & Ashley

Things I Did Not Resist Buying:
2 new sets of shoes for my mammals
A set of sand scooper toys shaped like crabs. (they rock & 88 cents for 2- come on.)
A box of Cinnabon soft cookies
Underwears with monkeys on them.

I am just a cog in the consumer wheel, people.

PS snuggles is still kickin!- keep those cards and letters coming.
More tomorrow and/or when my brain is back at at least 80% minimum function.
Happy Mommy's Day to the mommies of the world.

RIP Cuddles
Saturday, May 07, 2005

Let me just say that going into this I had no delusions of bunny grandeur. I did not picture me and the girls and Cuddles and Snuggles romping in a technicolor field on a sunny day with "Born Free" playing in the background. (Though now that I think about it, that would be cool.) No, I knew what the odds were from the getgo. Really, I didn't even expect them to be alive the first morning. I grew up with experiences of abandoned wild bunny babies and I know that most don't live.
A very nice well- meaning person left me a comment on the last bunny post, and really, I do appreciate it. I guess she thought that judging from what she read I was just a jokah, playing mommy with the baby bunbuns. I do have a tendency to look at things from a humorous standpoint, and I thank the manufacturers of Lexapro for enhancing that natural trait in me over the past year. I am a funny gal, I cannot help that, it was passed to me genetically from my dad's side, sorry mommy. But I had already read all about wild baby bunnies on the internet and I was just going to try anyway bc although some may say I should have just let them die the first night outside in the cold, that goes against my personality. I love animals, even fetal looking bunny babies. I would not have been able to sleep thinking of their widdle stiff bodies laying in the woods.
What happened was I put them in a plastic bowl with rags in it like I had read on this vet's website. It was in a shoebox. Sometime during the night Cuddles hopped out of the bowl in the shoebox and became trapped between the bowl and the shoebox wall and was probably too cold. Her little body didn't have rigor mortis when I found her so she couldn't have been dead a long long time.
On a brighter note, Snuggles is still feisty today. She was crazy for food when I took her out this morning and ate alot of milk plus pancakes and sausage. Her eyes still aren't open but her ears are starting to stand up and her tail is starting to assume the bunny position. She is definitely a lover and a fighter. I still have hope for her, even after the demise of Cuddles. So there.

Specific Instructions on How to Go Insane
Friday, May 06, 2005

1. be off work
2. hear your kids waking up nice and early.
3. get up and look outside. see that it is raining like a monsoon.
4. listen to your kids whine that they don't want that or that or that or that for breakfast.
5. watch a baby rabbit pee on you.
6. keep trying to use the computer.
7. listen to your kids scream bloody murder every time you sit in the computer chair.
8. use the computer for 3-5 minute increments all day because of #8
9. have no one call you all morning.
10. feel sorry for yourself.
11. hear your kids screaming over toys and whining every 10 seconds bc it's raining and they can't go outside and they want to make each others' life miserable.
12. put your kids down for a nap and decide to lie down and try to go to sleep.
13. have 4 people call you in a row.
14. give up on the nap and get up to have some peace and quiet to use the computer.
15. hear your kids wake up from their nap an hour early.
16. listen to your kids scream that they don't want that or that or that for a snack.
17. answer the phone and have the person who was going to come babysit so you could escape and go to the chiropractor and tanning bed tell you they're sorry that they can't come 15 minutes before you were supposed to leave so there is no way you can find a replacement.
18. hear your children say ma, mama, or mom for the three thousandth four hundred forty third time.
19. call your job and ask your friend to bring your check by since now you can't go get it to deposit it.
20. wait for your friend to come.
21. 20 minutes after they should have arrived, call your friend and ask where they are.
22. listen to them tell you they're so sorry they forgot.
23. run into your bedroom
24. post on your blog to vent& relieve your frustrations.
25. continue feeling sorry for yourself as your kids scream mamamaamamamamama.

Observing primates in their natural habitat.

Note: It is raining outside.They looked out the window and said "towel" then took their shirts off to dry things off out there. I can only put them back on so many times before I give up. (click to bigify pics and see comments.)
Picture 004Picture 001Picture 002Picture 006Picture 009

Me so slack.

Sorry if you gave up on it, but I posted again on the other blog. If you don't know what this means ask me.

They're definitely bunnies.
Thursday, May 05, 2005

I cannot believe how in just 24 hours they have changed so much. They are definitely looking more like bunnies. They're getting feistier and even trying to hop a little when I take them out to feed them but still no eyeballs open. They are digging on the Kitty Milk and even made a couple of little squeaky baby sounds tonight. However they are so very small and tender and fragile. It's amazing to me how their skin is so paper thin. God is a cool Creator Guy. I think they're not out of the woods yet though. Tomorrow I will call the vet to see if they will take them or tell me someone who will. Whenever I took them out to feed them tonight the girls went berserk wanting me to give the bunnies to them. Yeah right. Then they went and got their stuffed rabbits the Easter bunny brought em and tried to force me to feed them kitty milk too. Okay, so I pretended I was feeding the stuffed bunnies kitty milk to make the monkeys shut up. So what.
Picture 014
If you click to bigify this picture you will see that Milk Replacement for Kittens makes kittens so smart and strong they can actually feed themselves from a little kitty bottle. Wow, that's alot of bang for a buck.
Picture 017
Does not look like a mouse. Shut up.
Picture 025
They like to get comfy by snuggling down in the wrinkles of the towel.

I will also take it as a good sign that one peed on my hand while I was feeding it. Kidney function, check.

PS Stop saying I'm attached to them.

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Who's the Monkey Mama?

Location: Planet Twinstar, Monkeyville, United States

I'm a real live human person...the slightly wacky mom of 6 year old identical twin primate princesses and one 2year old monkeyboy. I'm divorced from a crazy baboon and remarried to a big snuggly gorilla. I thank God daily for my wonderful family and friends, without whom I would go berserk. My chirren are the cutest kids ever born (besides yours) and if you don't believe that you obviously need to see a shrink.

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